Cuckolding and Other Things

i told a friend yesterday that my relationship with Diane seems to be close to the  "be careful what you wish for" stage.  Isn't it true that in many marriages we fantasize for years about erotic situations, never fully grasping the emotional and countless other ramifications they might bring.

Diane's full-fledged affair with Paul has blossomed into one that clearly has some deep affection and intimacy.  He for Her and She for him.  Despite Diane's many and sincere professions of Her love for me, observing and experiencing the feelings they have for each other is a difficult thing for any husband (even a sissy wife like me) to deal with. 

In another man's arms......

When couples where the wife is dominant move into cuckolding, there's probably an element of humiliation that both partners enjoy albeit from different perspectives.  One dishes it out and the other is the recipient.  The humiliation you often read about or see depicted in various photos or artworkwith a cuckolding theme often deals with the raw sexual aspect of the relationship.  Whether it be the lover making ferocious love to the wife, the cuckold fluffing and cleaning or even sexual comparisons between the lover and the cuckold, sex is at the central theme of the literature, photographs or art.

But there's a different type of humiliation and angst that arises when the wife and her new lover develop strong feelings for one another.  i still believe that Diane loves me, but no matter how often She tells me and no matter what She does to express it, knowing She has deep feelings for Paul takes cuckolding to a different level in my opinion. 

On a lighter note, my gurlfriend Candi's been busy and hasn't been able to post but we have kept in touch.  Candi's still looking for "Mr. Right", a man who can "can bring out the woman inside" but she's running into the same age-old problem many of us gurls run into - many so called dominants aren't what they say they are! 

One would think an attractive CD wouldn't have such a hard time finding a Dominant Man.  Yet, so many of the people who contact them initially come off as dominant but once they meet with you, other submissive and even feminine desires of their own start coming out.  Very frustrating!

Have to go.  i'm making a special Dinner for Diane tonight.  No special occasion.  i just want to surprise Her with something She enjoys.

love,

sissy terri

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Cumming Close

I haven't hijacked my sissy wife or revoked her blogging privileges but I have kept her quite busy this week with plenty of housework and other feminine things to do in addition to a short business trip she had to take.   So this is probably a first for the blog where I post two times in a row.

My time with Paul last weekend was all that I had hoped it would be, and more.  Much more.  Paul's awakened  my sexually submissive side and made me want more.  Again, much more.  Much like we have different personality types, I think we all have different types of sexual personalities.  I've always had this dominant streak in me.  I love it and no doubt it was fed by the fact that I had a very submissive husband. I still have that streak but things have changed.

Paul is a real man.  A man's man.   Physically strong, masculine and handsome, he's so damned sexy.  I can't help but give in to him and the more I'm with him, the more I do.

Last Sunday I came twice while he spanked me.  On all fours on our marital bed, he took a belt to me and gave me the spanking he had promised.  He told me to play with myself while he used the belt and I did.  I upset him when I cam too soon.  He controlled the next orgasm, using his fingers on me as he slapped my ass with his other hand.  Our afternoon was far from over, the sex with Paul continued for two more hours.

As we lay in bed together talking when all the sex was done, I came so very close to telling him about my sissy cuckold.  He now knows that I enjoy being dominant with terry and understands that part of my attraction to him is the diversion it provides.  I chose to hold back from telling him more, wanting to make 100% sure that both of us are totally trusting of one another.

Throughout all this I've surprised even myself.  I enjoy having a submissive husband and a dominant lover.  I'm surprised at how uncomplicated it really is at the present time.  Right now, everyone's needs are being met.  Mine more than anyone's I guess.

All this doesn't make me love terri any less.  Far from it.  We are who we are.   I knew terri had a submissive and feminine side when we married.  She knew I enjoyed being a little dominant.  Now, she's more submissive and feminine and I'm a lot more dominant with her.   My yearnings to be submissive are what's new but they aren't overwhelming either.   I don't care how submissive I become with Paul, I'll always be dominant with terri.

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I Love Giving Orders

From the title of this post I'm sure you can tell this isn't coming from my sissy wife terri!  As I pen this post, she's busy golfing.  How lucky is she to have a wife like me?  One who told her to go golfing today, enjoy herself and she didn't even need to hurry back.

Actually I ordered her to go golfing today.  I now have the house to myself.  And in about a half hour, I'm going to be hosting my lover Paul for an afternoon of fun.

I haven't had sex with Paul for a couple of weeks and I'm aching for it.  He also owes me a spanking.  I love submitting to Paul.  It's a nice diversion from being in charge all the time with Terri.  And while
she's such a sensual and attentive lover, Paul is a far better lover in a masculine way.

I teased terri before she left to play golf telling her that "At least you're a much better golfer than Paul."  There wasn't any malice in my teasing, and terri knows that already.  Doesn't mean I lover her any less. 

And this post?  It was just a spur of the moment thing.  I think she's going to be very surprised when she finally reads it!

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More Feminine Feelings

i was off to the gym early again this morning but unlike yesterday, i was still in my gym clothing when Diane left for work.  Diane commented on my rather leisurely pace as i sipped on a couple of cups of coffee and read some newspapers.

"No housework to do today?" She asked with a sarcastic tone, knowing i had some ironing to get done.

When i told Her i was soon going to take a bath She immediately said "Make sure to shave your legs."   i told Her i was planning to and that was the end of the discussion.  It was all very nonchalant and seemed so routine.  A few years ago Her request would have put me in a very deep subspace and made the whole thing seemed so kinky.

This morning, it just seemed so natural, and so did shaving my legs.

Hairy legs are a thing of the past for me.  i love the smoothness of my legs and chest. Since i've kept my legs shaved, i'm surprised by a couple of things.  The first is how people don't really notice and if they do, i really can't tell.  The other thing is that there are many men out there whose legs appear to be shaved.  Either they shave them or they're naturally smooth.  Given the number of men i see with smooth legs, i'd say there are more "shavers" out there than most people think.

i wonder if they're wearing panties too?

Love,

sissy terri

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Feminine Feelings

When Diane left for work this morning i had already returned from the gym, showered and was fully dressed for another day as Her housewife.  i did some cleaning around the house, paid some bills and got some paperwork ready for a trip to the accountant tomorrow afternoon.

It felt so natural when She gave me a kiss on the cheek and left for work.  i had some free time and i scoured the web for a photo that would capture that moment; a moment where i felt so submissive to Her and feminine at the same time.

My search brought me to a blog called Eve's Rib which features "The gender role reversal art of Jamie Vesta.  i was surprised that i had never come across the blog before but also disappointed that nothing seems to have been posted there since last November.

It didn't take me long to find this photo depicting a masculine looking woman dressed in male clothing kissing her husband goodbye as she leaves for work.

Of the two, it's the husband who looks sillier and i'm sure that's the way the artist intended it to be.  Role reversal in a marriage doesn't necessarily have to be driven by FemDom but i think in many marriages, it plays a significant part.  Rarely does it involve both genders crossdressing either.  While Diane sometimes wears slacks as part of a nice business suit, that's about the extent of Her wearing anything that hints of opposite sex clothing.

i on the other hand didn't have one piece of male clothing when She left for work.  i don't think i looked silly at all, and it all felt quite natural.

love,

sissy terri

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Missing You

Diane and i were away most of last week and didn't get back until late Sunday.  i had originally planned on posting but the wi-fi where we were wasn't very good and it became just too cumbersome. When we got back home, i came down with a bad cold and i'm just getting over it now. 

i've missed posting and i've missed you, my readers in some ways :)  i'll try to post more regularly in the coming days.

We traveled with another couple with each of us having our own separate accommodations and overall, the trip wasn't very kinky.  Naturally, i was always in panties and in the evening when we were alone or at bedtime, i did dress appropriately like Diane's wife.

There were a couple of kinky couple type of scenes where Diane spent time on the phone with Paul while I was present.  Once i knelt at Her feet and massaged them while She talked with him and the next time, i actually performed oral sex on Her while they talked!

It was Her idea and She told me ahead of time that She was going to tease Paul into having phone sex with Her if he could.  It turned out that he was alone in his office when everyone else had gone home.  When he told Diane that it brought a smile to Her face.

Performing oral sex on your Wife while She talks sexily with Her lover is a different cuckolding experience, and it could be the closest i might ever get to Diane and Paul's intimate times together.  i could hear Diane's side of the conversation perfectly as i did what She wanted me to, but i could only catch a very little bit of Paul's.

It's quite embarrassing to hear his kinky and somewhat dominant side with Diane.  She was really enjoying herself and had already had a couple of small orgasms as She lay on Her back while i worshiped Her when Paul told Her to "get on all fours and put your ass in the air so I can take you from behind."

Diane obeyed, which in and of itself turned me on tremendously. and had Her ass up in the air with her face buried in the pillow but still able to talk to Paul.  i knew i had to keep licking and Diane then told Paul She was about to cum.  A few moments later Diane screamed "It's too late!" and had a thunderous orgasm.  i found out later that Paul had told Her She couldn't cum without his permission and Her disobedience had earned Her a spanking next time they got together!

i wasn't allowed to cum until their phone call was over.  When Diane related the parts of the conversation I missed, i came close to cumming several times.  When She told me about the spanking She was owed, She knew i was about to burst and gave me permission.

All of it was one of the most erotic and intimate times i've ever had with my Wife.  The humiliation i felt was strong and lasting.  i can't get it out of my mind. i can't wait until i get to kiss, soothe and worship Diane's beautiful ass after Paul spanks it!

Diane may have exercised Her authority by telling me i couldn't see Jake or any other man anymore.  However, that void in my life seems to have been filled by Her kicking up the cuckolding a notch!

love,

sissy terri

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Subtle but Significant

i made a small but significant change to my blog title yesterday.  i did so at Diane's suggestion. She didn't insist upon it but thought it would be a good idea that i add the word "Cuckold" to the title of my blog.  The URL is still the same.  All i've done is change the title. 

Years before i began this blog, Diane had an affair without my knowledge.  i won't rehash all that happened, but it was a difficult time in our marriage but fortunately we survived.  By definition, i was a cuckold then because of Her affair.  i just didn't know about it.  Now, i'm cuckolded with full knowledge and consent.

A Married Sissy Cuckold

The significance of this change is that i believe it gives some sense of permanency to my current status.  In other words, i don't see Diane stopping Her affair with Paul at any time soon.  She's grown quite comfortable with him and he with Her.  For Diane, it's also important that i accept not only the fact that i'm Her cuckold, but accept and embrace Her dominance and decision that i remain faithful to Her and only Her.

i also wanted to thank all of You who frequent my tumblr blog.  The tumblr phenomenon is really fascinating.  It's just another example of how technology has made so many resources available for everyone to share.  i now have more than 4500 followers on tumblr.  It's a small number compared to other blogs on that site.  i hope everyone who stops by enjoys the pictures i reblog there!

love,

sissy terri

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A Sissy Cuckold Sunday

i want to thank everyone for their comments/advice to my last few posts.  i find it both fascinating and helpful to see the diversity of opinions, ideas, comments etc. when it comes to a submissive's role in a D/s or Female Led Relationship like i'm in.

Some people find Diane to be totally within Her rights in so far as the restrictions She's put on me, while others make her out to be the modern day version of Attila the Hun!  She's no Atilla (although She might be a distant relative)...just teasing of course.

One of my loyal followers, Christine, made a reference to my "discovering that you have preferences and limits, and you would like those respected, at least to some degree."  The comment gave me plenty to think about.  Preferences, limits and respect are three very important terms for D/s couples in my opinion.

A preference is something that you like or favor more than another thing.  It's a little different than "liking" something because it usually infers a choice between two things.  In the instant case, Diane's decision to prohibit me from having sex with another man deals with my preference to have that type of sex rather than to refrain totally from it.  She's totally aware of my bisexual urges but has decided that She doesn't want me to act on them anymore, telling me that She didn't like the direction in which things were headed.   Diane respects my preferences, but as the Dominant partner, doesn't have to let me indulge in them.  A submissive needs to understand that.

A limit is far different.  i've discovered that my limits have been tested often, but Diane's never done anything that i would consider going beyond any limit that i've told her about.  i also can't recall any situation where She's gone and done something that we at least haven't discussed before in some context.  Her surprises have never been anything that's "crossed a limit."  As such, She's been very, very respectful of my limits.

i had a lovely conversation with my friend Candi on Sunday afternoon.  i've said this before but it's so awesome to have a sissy girly friend to talk to on a semi-regular basis.  i'm able to get my feelings out and listen to her's as well.  Candi told me about a brand new corset she got last week which set off a very girly chat between us about how sexy and feminine we both think corsets are.  i also told her

Candi's Corset???

about the first time Diane bought me a corset.  It was really our first semi-public display of Her dominance over me and the revelation that i was a crossdressing submissive!  Candi's promised that she's going to post soon about her lovely new corset!

Sunday was also a very "cuckolding" type of day.  Diane spent a few hours here with Paul while i was at a college basketball game with a neighbor.  Diane texted me during the game saying that i should invite our neighbor over after the game for a drink or a glass of wine.  It was her way of letting me know Paul had left and She was ready to act as if nothing unusual was going on by having our neighbor over.

As i suspected would happen, as soon as our neighbor left Diane had me upstairs in bed worshiping where Paul had been just hours before.  The orgasm She experienced with me seemed as powerful as any She'd ever had.  When She has these very powerful orgasms, i always wonder what causes them.  i'm almost 100% certain it's more a psychological or emotional thing that it is a physical one.  i'd like to think i'm good at what i do but i don't think my oral performance wavers that much.

i was also allowed to have a rather powerful orgasm of my own, the remnants of which i was forced to clean, an act which sometimes gets me turned on all over again.   So far, Diane's taking good care of my own needs and i hope it stays that way :)

Once again, thanks for listening.  Your comments and emails are always welcome.  Also don't be afraid to send me an email if you've discovered an interesting sissy or cuckold blog.  i do need to update and freshen up my blog lists a bit.

A while ago someone sent me a link to Cuckold Scenes and i can't remember who it was!  Cuckold Scenes is a blog that's far different than mine but interesting just the same.  Even though i don't get sexually graphic here, believe me when i tell you i still have all those kinky thoughts and fantasies.

My own sissy fantasies are probably more in line with my good friend Leeanne.  i always find myself wanting to be the sissies depicted on her blog, Leeanne's Sissy Musings.  Her recent series of posts, "Blowjobs Illustrated for Sissies" are to die for.  If they don't turn you on, you better check your pulse!

Love,

sissy terri

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