"I believe in one of your prior posts you mentioned Jake taking your man p***y. Does that still happen, or was it just wishful thinking on your part? We would love to hear about it when it does occur."Here's how i answered it:
Yes, it does. i've always had a hard time writing about the more sexually graphic aspects of my intimate relationships. So i tend to leave that our or sometimes hint at it. In time, i may include more about it. Hope you understand...xox
i tried to keep the answer simple but obviously, there's some complexity to it. i shouldn't find it hard to write about such things but i do and shortly after i started this blog i decided that i would keep it more R-rated than X-rated. i suppose my reluctance and difficulty to pen these things here stem a bit from the embarrassment of it, some guilt and maybe even a bit of prudishness. Who knows. i've given up trying to psychoanalyze myself a long time ago. i wouldn't even turn that process over to the experts!
i have enjoyed taking the full female role during sex with Jake in the past, and this time around we've done it again. But now, it's quite different, fulfilling and even humiliating in a very kinky way.
Yesterday's meeting with Jake was in a strange way, all encompassing of the many feelings i fantasize about as a submissive sissy. That's were the "sissy satisfaction" comes in.
First, there was the anticipation of receiving a spanking for what i believed to be an unknown offense on my part. Turns out, the spanking i received was just to prove that Jake could spank me anytime he wanted to. i questioned him about, which only led to a more severe spanking. "I owe you one because I can" was his explanation.
There was also his requirement that i be wearing a white bra, white panties and white thigh highs to greet him when he arrived. Whether they are easy or difficult, sissies follow orders and derive enjoyment from doing so.
Then there was the housework i did while waiting for him. He'd left me a list of things he wanted done with the final item simply stating that he wanted the house to look perfect when he got home. i thought it did, but he hardly noticed or said anything.
Before any expressions of intimacy, there was the spanking. Jake was more verbal than usual, at one point telling me to thank him for every swat on my fanny. The spanking began as playful and became more intense though never being violent in any way. Yet it was quite painful; the pain brought about by the length of time i spent over his lap.
My ass a shiny shade of red - "Go look at yourself in the hall mirror" he told me - he was ready to have me serve him orally. i had to slip off his shoes, take his socks off, undo his belt, take his slacks off and fold them neatly, slide his jockey shorts off and wait for him to give me permission to take his cock. Anticipation can be very arousing.
My serving him wasn't a rushed type of thing. i didn't spend all my time on his cock either. He wanted his balls paid attention to. My preferences weren't important. i just followed directions.
i was so looking forward to receiving a facial from him. Honestly, i'd been looking forward to it since i knew we'd be getting together. He knew it. My desire was ignored. i thought sure he was going to orgasm several times and somehow he was able to show the type of self control i certainly lack and continued to have me serve him.
The last time he did so he told me to stop and go into his bedroom, take the bed down and wait for him there. i didn't have to wait long. He had me take my panties off and climb onto the bed on all fours. My ass was reddened again, sensually lubricated and used for his pleasure.
So much sissy satisfaction. Yet, there was plenty of sexual frustration.
My CB-3000 was on the entire time, without a chance of it being removed. Jakes lovemaking was marvelous, skillful, sensual and dominant. He had me assume several positions, a couple of which we'd never tried before. i wasn't able to have an orgasm in chastity, though once i felt very, very close.
Perhaps a true submissive experiences no such frustrations. They're 100% in tune with the desires and pleasure of their Dom/mes and nothing else. Does such a submissive even exist?
On the other hand, the frustrations i experienced yesterday provided a perverse type of satisfaction. The type only a sissy submissive might be able to understand.
love,
sissy terri
