Chaste and Feminine

Yesterday marked the beginning of my third month in chastity.  As required, early in the morning i sent Diane and Paul a copy of the daily Chastity Report that included a monthly and year-to-date summary of the time i've been in chastity.

In February i spent 81.62% of the time locked up in my CB-3000.  Year-to-date, the percentage is a bit higher at 85.29%.  February's drop in percentage was driven by our hosting guests for a two week period and the various activities that surrounded that time.

Diane is very happy with the percentage of time i've been locked up.  Similarly, i am pleased but also proud of what i've been able to accomplish.  The percentages are far greater than either one of us thought they'd be and are driven by the fact that almost every night, i've slept in chastity, despite some morning discomfort.

i still find it surprising and remarkable that this has worked so well.  If you recall, Diane was never a fan of chastity, insisting that the whole thing would be too much work.  She prefers a "low maintenance submissive" and in that regard  She's trained me quite well.  The chastity has turned out to be pretty low maintenance and as i get used to it, should be even easier for Her.

In addition, the "results" of this effort aren't only manifested by the hard data She and Paul see every day.   Sure, those numbers represent concrete and easily measurable results, but they fail to take into account other intangible benefits that my chastity has provided.  Among these are a more submissive demeanor (i know, that's hard to believe i could be more submissive), greater obedience, a calmness that comes from accepting my sex life is under Diane's total control and even greater commitment to  my role as Her sissy wife.

Finally, chastity has at times made me feel more feminine. Yes, i am in panties 24/7 and very often wearing more than just lingerie, but the pink CB-3000 also enhances my submissive femininity.  Even if i'm wearing just a pair of panties, or even nothing at all, the cute little pink cage and lock between my legs reminds me of my sissy wife status!

However, it's always nice to get really "gurlied" up while in chastity.  Maybe a cute pink corset like this.  Do you think it's feminine enough?

The photo is courtesy of my sissy gurlfriend Jo Bradford.  Kisses Jo.....xox!

And for those of you who guessed that the last pair of panties shown in yesterday's post were my favorite, you guessed right!  But let's be honest, i'd be happy to wear any of them!

love,

sissy terri

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A Sissy Cuckold's Chastity Progression

Nearly three years ago i wrote a post entitled "Too Much Work" where, after i'd brought up the idea of keeping me in chastity at times to Diane, She immediately dismissed it.  She felt it was too much work for the Dominant partner in any relationship and preferred "low maintenance domination."  How times have changed.

Fast forward to this past June when during a phone conversation we had while i was away on a short business trip, Diane was the one who brought up the chastity discussion.  Her hinting at it and the suggestion that maybe She'd make me wear one only when i was at home or when She was with Her lover Paul aroused me.  She was teasing me and though i enjoyed it, never thought that the idea would go much further.  i was wrong.

Then this fall Diane surprisingly and suddenly set chastity as a condition of my seeing Jake again.  Jake had contacted me and wanted to get together again but i needed Diane's permission.  She took Her time in making up Her mind.  i wrote about Her decision and how shocked i was when She said:

"You can see Jake" Diane said.  i immediately thanked Her but was quickly interrupted.  "I'm not finished.  There's a condition attached to my decision.  If you're going to see him, you're going to be wearing a chastity belt when you do."

More shocking was the fact that She'd already ordered a chastity belt for me; the pink CB-3000.

Then in late December, when the time i was spending with Jake became less frequent when he began dating a woman after his divorce, Diane took it a step further.  On New Year's Eve while we were on a ski vacation, She announced that as part of "our" New Years Resolutions, i was to begin a daily calendar that would log how much time i spent in and out of chastity.  Each day i provide Her with the updated calendar.  It contains daily, weekly and month-to-date percentages of my time in chastity, along with notes.  The notes explain why i was out of chastity as well some of my own personal thoughts.  Yesterday marked four full weeks under this new regimen.  i've spent approximately 88% of 2015 in chastity.

Another surprising, and peripherally related, event took place on Monday, January 12th.  We hosted Diane's friend Linda that night to watch the Ohio State - Oregon national championship game.  Diane delivered another shocker, telling Linda:

....that Paul would be coming over on Wednesday afternoon like he usually does but this time, "terri will be here and won't be hiding this time.  It's all in the open now between the three of us."

The announcement was a shocker to me, though Diane made it seem like i knew all along.  It was difficult to hide my embarrassment and shock, but i was aroused.

Then just two days after that on Wednesday the 14th, i sat down with Paul and Diane and listened to his "rules" for me as a cuckold, two of which related directly to my chastity.  They are:

• When the three of us are together i must always be in chastity and he will determine if i am allowed out of it.  At all other times, that's up to Diane.
• i am to send him a copy of the daily chastity report i send to Diane. 

And finally last night, Diane added one more small but not insignificant requirement to my daily chastity report.  Beginning on February 1st, i will also be required to keep track of those days on which either of us has an orgasm.  There's to be a column for each of us.  If Diane has an orgasm (or more than one) on that day, i am to highlight it in green.  If i have one, it's to be highlighted in pink.

This most recent command from Diane made me realize just how few orgasms i've been allowed to have this past month.  i don't even remember when the last one was.  i think it was two weekends ago.

i hope i haven't bored you with this post which is more or less just a summary of how my chastity has progressed, a timeline of sorts that helps put this part of my life in a different perspective. 

Orgasms are indeed an important part of someone's sex life.  We tend to view them as some type of "mark of success" of any particular sex act.  For many, i suppose it's impossible to separate sex and orgasms.  Seems like you need one with the other. 

i'm beginning to understand how that isn't necessarily true.  i can't quite explain it but i can feel it. 

It's almost unbelievable how things have changed, Diane's attitude towards chastity in particular.  i also can't help but wonder when, in the course of the events i've just described, Diane might have decided to connect or link my chastity to the decisions She's made in the past several months. 

love,

sissy terri

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Chastity Time - Lots of it

On New Year's Eve in a post called A Chaste New Year i wrote the following:

Diane wants to discuss some New Year's resolutions later today and one of them is definitely chastity.  She wants to institute a calendar which will log how many hours i spend in chastity each day.  She's yet to decide what the daily/monthly goal will be, but She definitely wants me to keep track of it.

We did discuss New Year's resolutions and the chastity discussion was first and foremost.  The end result (a better term would be "Diane's final decision")  was that I would keep a daily tally of how many hours i spent in and out of chastity, enter it on a spreadsheet, calculate the percentage and enter a short note about my time in and/or out of chastity each day.  The spreadsheet would contain columns for the date, time in, time out, daily note and another column for a weekly summary.

She also told me to set it up so that there would be a separate sheet for each month.  She wanted daily, month-to-date and year-to-date percentages calculated on a continuing basis.  i would email the spreadsheet to Her each day.   i'm not an excel geek but this was pretty easy to do.  i've also been emailing the sheet to Her every day.  We've called it "The Chastity Report."

Formalizing my chastity is a significant change in our lifestyle.  It's something that i would have written about much sooner, were it not for the other significant event that took place last Sunday - the sissy cuckold gift i received from both Diane and Her lover Paul.  It reminds me of how one significant news event overtakes another on cable news networks.  Everything else is placed on the back burner.

Diane's chastity rules are quire simple:  i'm to be in chastity all the time unless i have Her permission to be out.  i don't have a specified target percentage.  She says i don't need one.  She's correct.  She decides when i'm in or out and as a result, these decisions will drive the percentage.  i can ask to get out and in "emergencies" i'm allowed to take it off, but understand that there will be consequences if She deems no real emergency existed.  i'm allowed to take it off when i shower or bathe for hygiene purposes, thoroughly washing the CB and putting it back on when i'm done.

We're ten days into this and Diane is very satisfied with the results thus far.  All my orgasms are controlled by Her.  How and when they occur is something that rests with Her.  Where once She found the whole "chastity thing too much work" She now enjoys the control it gives Her.  She says i appear even more docile and submissive than i was before.  Some may find that hard to believe.

As for me, i do feel it has had a positive effect on me.  Other than the angst i've had about what the future holds with Paul, more time in chastity seems to have had a calming effect on me.  In the strangest sort of ways, i believe it's helped me deal with the situation and handle it better.  i'm also sleeping with the CB more often.  Some nights Diane has told me i could take it off, but most nights She says nothing.  i've overcome the morning discomfort i feel from erections, learning to accept them.  They eventually subside and are a reminder that true submission does come with some discomfort and yes, even pain.

Remarkably after these first ten days of 2015, my time in the pink CB-3000 is nearly 85%.  When we started this "chastity thing" i never thought it would get to this level.  Now, i'm committed to it and obviously so is Diane.

Yesterday Diane had me put in an order for a 200 plastic numbered locks.  She wants to move awayfrom the little brass padlock She uses now.  Even though i don't, it's something i could easily sneak in and out of without Her knowledge.  The numbered locks will eliminate this security issue.   The CB-3000 came with a handful of these locks but She believes we'll need more.  Many more.

Sure, i could still "cheat" when i take my CB off when i shower.  She knows that.  i've promised Her i wouldn't.  It's a promise i want to keep.

As for Paul, he does know that Diane keeps me in chastity.  How this plays out in the future remains to be seen.  

love,

sissy terri

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Chastity in Public

Diane and i attended a retirement dinner last night.  It was a combination celebration/roast of an esteemed colleague of mine who spent many years as a credit to his profession.  His departure was rather sudden considering his position and the many responsibilities he has.  His decision was his own and driven by his ultimate dedication to family.

For me, it was an an opportunity to chat with many colleagues i haven't seen in awhile and to wish the guest of honor a long and fulfilling retirement.  It was also kind of a melancholy.  Having retired relatively early in life from a profession that for the most part, bestows prestige and accomplishment upon those who remain well into their 60's and beyond, i felt a tinge of sadness.  How many people walk away when they're at the cusp of the peak of their profession?  By the same token, how many people have the opportunity to fulfill a fantasy that they've had for most of their lives?

i was greeted by many people curious to know how and what i was doing.  Questions like what i was doing with all my free time now, how my consulting business was doing, etc.  When Diane was close by She would often answer for me by just saying She was keeping me busy at home with a "honey do list."  It got a few chuckles.

Overall, the evening was kind of awkward for several reasons.  First of all, Paul was in attendance.  Even though he sat at our table (without his wife) we didn't socialize that much, nor did we go out of our way to avoid each other.  But sitting across from my Wife's lover who also happens to know that i'm submissive to Her and thinks i don't know that they're screwing around can be a little awkward. 

i also happened to be wearing my CB-3000 and was self-conscious about it.  It wasn't a formal event, more business casual than anything else.  i wore a blazer, button down shirt and dress slacks but felt that the CB was noticeable through my slacks.  i asked Diane if i could take it off before leaving and She dismissed the idea as silly, saying i was being paranoid for no reason.  i was nervous about if throughout the evening.  The worst part was when i got a hug from a few women i hadn't seen in quite a while.  One time, i swear one woman got close enough to me so that her inner thigh pressed against the CB.  i thought she gave me kind of a weird look.

Finally, i was bothered by that fact that Diane appeared indifferent to the possibility that someone could possibly realize i was wearing a chastity belt.  Again, She dismissed this idea as total paranoia and silliness on my part, saying that anyone brushing up against my CB might laugh it off and think it was just my being a little "excited."  Unlikely.  There's a big difference between an erection and a piece of hard plastic.

When we got home, our discussion about the evening was short.  It was late and She wasn't in the mood to talk much about it.  "You make it seem like everyone there was focused on your crotch" She laughed.  She also suggested that i enjoyed the many hugs i got from different women.  "You probably enjoyed all the attention you were getting" She smirked.

"You're right" i finally told Her.  "Maybe they did mistake my chastity belt for excitement."

"Would you rather they feel some bra straps on you?" She asked.

She was right.  The CB could be mistaken for an erection, but not a bra strap!

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Sissy Satisfaction & Sexual Frustration

An anonymous reader left the following comment/question to my post "Serve me...you sissy slut!"several days ago:

"I believe in one of your prior posts you mentioned Jake taking your man p***y. Does that still happen, or was it just wishful thinking on your part? We would love to hear about it when it does occur."

Here's how i answered it:
  

Yes, it does. i've always had a hard time writing about the more sexually graphic aspects of my intimate relationships. So i tend to leave that our or sometimes hint at it. In time, i may include more about it. Hope you understand...xox

i tried to keep the answer simple but obviously, there's some complexity to it.  i shouldn't find it hard to write about such things but i do and shortly after i started this blog i decided that i would keep it more R-rated than X-rated.   i suppose my reluctance and difficulty to pen these things here stem a bit from the embarrassment of it, some guilt and maybe even a bit of prudishness.  Who knows.  i've given up trying to psychoanalyze myself a long time ago.  i wouldn't even turn that process over to the experts!

i have enjoyed taking the full female role during sex with Jake in the past, and this time around we've done it again.  But now, it's quite different, fulfilling and even humiliating in a very kinky way. 

Yesterday's meeting with Jake was in a strange way, all encompassing of the many feelings i fantasize about as a submissive sissy.  That's were the "sissy satisfaction" comes in.

First, there was the anticipation of receiving a spanking for what i believed to be an unknown offense on my part.  Turns out, the spanking i received was just to prove that Jake could spank me anytime he wanted to.  i questioned him about, which only led to a more severe spanking.  "I owe you one because I can" was his explanation.

There was also his requirement that i be wearing a white bra, white panties and white thigh highs to greet him when he arrived.  Whether they are easy or difficult, sissies follow orders and derive enjoyment from doing so.

Then there was the housework i did while waiting for him.  He'd left me a list of things he wanted done with the final item simply stating that he wanted the house to look perfect when he got home.  i thought it did, but he hardly noticed or said anything.

Before any expressions of intimacy, there was the spanking.  Jake was more verbal than usual, at one point telling me to thank him for every swat on my fanny.  The spanking began as playful and became more intense though never being violent in any way.  Yet it was quite painful; the pain brought about by the length of time i spent over his lap.

My ass a shiny shade of red - "Go look at yourself in the hall mirror" he told me - he was ready to have me serve him orally.  i had to slip off his shoes, take his socks off, undo his belt, take his slacks off and fold them neatly, slide his jockey shorts off and wait for him to give me permission to take his cock.  Anticipation can be very arousing.

My serving him wasn't a rushed type of thing.  i didn't spend all my time on his cock either.  He wanted his balls paid attention to.  My preferences weren't important.  i just followed directions.

i was so looking forward to receiving a facial from him.  Honestly, i'd been looking forward to it since i knew we'd be getting together.  He knew it.  My desire was ignored.  i thought sure he was going to orgasm several times and somehow he was able to show the type of self control i certainly lack and continued to have me serve him.

The last time he did so he told me to stop and go into his bedroom, take the bed down and wait for him there.  i didn't have to wait long.  He had me take my panties off and climb onto the bed on all
fours.  My ass was reddened again, sensually lubricated and used for his pleasure.

So much sissy satisfaction.  Yet, there was plenty of sexual frustration.

My CB-3000 was on the entire time, without a chance of it being removed.  Jakes lovemaking was marvelous, skillful, sensual and dominant.  He had me assume several positions, a couple of which we'd never tried before.  i wasn't able to have an orgasm in chastity, though once i felt very, very close.

Perhaps a true submissive experiences no such frustrations.  They're 100% in tune with the desires and pleasure of their Dom/mes and nothing else.  Does such a submissive even exist?

On the other hand, the frustrations i experienced yesterday provided a perverse type of satisfaction.  The type only a sissy submissive might be able to understand.

love,

sissy terri

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"Licking" While Locked

Diane absolutely detests the term "licking" when it comes to the attention i pay to Her privates.  i'm been corrected every time i use it, sometimes the correction is more severe than others.  i've been trained to use the term She prefers; the correct term which of course is "worship."

However today, in an effort to promote some alliteration and assonance to my literary endeavors, i've been granted an "exception" by the powers-that-be.  In other words, Diane said i could use the term "licking" in the title of this post. 

It's not always this bad!

Since my CB-3000 arrived, Diane's discovered just how much She enjoys having Her pussy worshiped while my own private parts are safely secured.  While my "clitty" is caged, Her vulva and vagina are void of any such restrictions.

With Paul being absent from the scene longer than She'd like, Diane's made use of my lips, tongue, mouth and face more than usual.  Each time, my own excitement has been carefully compacted and confined to the cramped conditions of my cage.  Ouch.

i left a comment at the blog Under Contract to My Wife where Mick, the submissive, wrote about licking his Mistress as she recounted the time she had spent with her lover earlier that day.  Diane loves to talk to me as i do my own worship while never expecting (or allowing) a response from me.  i've tried to interject but have been told to just keep worshiping.  Her teasing talk continues until She's just about ready to explode into an orgasm.  The lull in Her chatter indicates She's focusing on the orgasm to come.

In the meantime Her caged cuckold, continues to lovingly lick.......oops....i mean worship :)

love,

sissy terri

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Full Cut Panties and Fall Hosiery Styles

i'm slowly getting accustomed to my CB-3000.  Daytime wear isn't that much of a problem (unless i become aroused and even then, the discomfort isn't as bad as i thought it would be) but wearing it to sleep results in quite a bit of discomfort in the morning.   A couple of my readers commented on my earlier post that "morning wood" would be a problem. 

Diane laughed when i mentioned this to Her.  "Morning wood?" She giggled.  "I think you mean an enlarged clitty!"  It was a cute joke and being accustomed to these comments, i took it in stride and appreciated Her sense of humor.  For now, Diane doesn't make me wear it at night.  At least i'm under close supervision as She sleeps by my side :)

Full Back Panties

i've also found that i'm more comfortable wearing a "full cut panty" when the CB-3000 is on.  If the panty i wear is too small, the extra bulk of the CB stretches it out and the leg openings seem to rub against my testicles causing a little bit of irritation.  i also mentioned this to Diane and She thought itwas a good idea that i wear a panty that "covers everything."

I'm going to have to do some shopping for more full cut panties.  Many in that style are plain.  Even though i love the plain pastels, i want to vary my selection so that i can get some that have pretty lace, trims and bows like the panty shown here.

i'm prepared to meet with Jake tomorrow, at which time i'm going to tell him about the conditions Diane has set for my seeing him.  It's going to be a long discussion.  i want to explain things fully to him; how Diane knows not only about my dressing, but about my seeing him.  i'll also tell him about Her Dominance over me, most of our lifestyle and Her decision to put me in chastity.  i'm going to be honest and up front with him.  It's the best way to go and given the circumstances, i don't have much choice.

i'm glad some of you enjoyed yesterday's post about the Maidenform sale.  i should also mention that i get a daily email from Bare Necessities.  This company has an excellent panty selection that features all the brand names in various styles.  Today's email blast from Bare Necessities promoted "6 Must Have Hosiery Styles!  Check it out.  Why miss out on all this sissy fun?

love,

sissy terri

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