Sissy Sex

That's what Diane calls it now:  sissy sex.  It's been several years since she's called it "making love" to me.  Now, whenever she wants to use her strap-on on me, she'll tell me to get ready for some "sissy sex."  If I ask for it, I have to refer to it as "sissy sex." 

"Get ready for sissy sex"
The term bothers me some.  It lacks in intimacy and feels cold, clinical and devoid of love.  Diane insists that's not the case.  I've discussed it with her a few times and the last time I asked her why she insisted on calling it that, she simply said "Can you think of a better term?  Seems pretty accurate to me."

Somehow, it makes me feel less of a "wife" when she uses that term.  She'll even mention it at times while she's working me with the strap-on.  Of course, the humiliation is a turn on and she never fails to please me that way.  I suppose as a submissive sissy male I should be most appreciative of what I have. 
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Being "Flirty"

There's a couple of "flirty" themes to this post today.  One has to do with what I'm wearing around the house today, and the other has to do with the wedding we attended last night.

I've always been a lover of the old fashioned frilly aprons like the one's you used to see in the 1950's or 1960's in movies, magazines, etc.  This Christmas, one of the many feminine type gifts I got from Diane was a pretty pink apron made by a company called Flirty Aprons.  It's one of my favorites and Diane has given me permission to order another one from the company. 

I'm wearing it now as I go about doing a few domestic tasks and will be wearing it when I prepare and serve dinner later this afternoon.  I'm sure you'll agree that prancing about in this apron (called the "Strawberry Shortcake") certainly helps make you feel like a sissy and a wife.

As to the wedding last night, Diane got a chance to see some friends she hasn't seen in a very long time.  One friend was a guy who was in her class in high school.  We sat at the same table as he and his wife and it wasn't long before there was some mutual flirtation going on between he and Diane.  When his wife left to go talk to someone, he asked me if I minded if he danced with Diane and after telling him it was fine, they spent the next several dances together on the dance floor, some of them very slow waltzes where they seemed to be having a good time.  The flirtation continued throughout the evening until it was time to leave.

On the way home, Diane asked me if I was upset that she had danced with Brian.  She knows me well and could sense I was a little upset.  Not at the dancing, but at the flirting.  I told her how I felt and we had a very little spat about it.  It's really my fault.  I want her to cuckold me, and when something like this happens I get jealous and confused.  Maybe I'm not a good cuckold candidate.   However, I want it so badly and part of me was excited at what went on last night.  We just need to talk about it more.
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Bridal Fantasy

To be a bride has to be every sissy's dream!
We're going to a wedding this evening.  A longtime friend of Diane's daughter is getting married.  Weddings always bring my bridal fantasies to the forefront.  I wonder how many sissy males have bridal fantasies?  It's hard to believe that any sissies wouldn't have a fantasy of getting all dressed up in a beautiful wedding gown and all the accessories!

Diane knows all about these fantasies of mine and she even said that someday she'd like to see us renew our vows with me as the bride.  It just hasn't happened.  It came close once in Las Vegas, at a place that dealt with fantasy weddings.  We were there for a few days but the owner was on vacation.  Just my luck.  Maybe someday.

In the meantime, we'll be attending the wedding tonight and I'll be so jealous of the bride. I'm sure she is going to look just perfect.  As for me, Diane's already told me to make sure I'm wearing a white bra and panty set (I've got just the right one), white garter and white thigh highs under my suit.  She's going to let me wear regular stockings to cover up the white hose.  She's not concerned as much about my humiliation and embarrassment as she is raising the eyebrows of her close friends. 
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A Gurl Friend?

So far, all of my bisexual play has been with somewhat dominant type married men who enjoy being serviced orally, some with a few other D/s related type kinks but nothing way over the top or extreme.  However, I've yet to play with another sissy, cross dresser or submissive.  It's something I've always wanted to do, but just haven't found the right person to do it with.  I'm also not actively looking and I am always very, very careful.

I do think about it often though, wondering what it would be like for two "girls like us" to play together.  I'm not sure I'd really enjoy it as much as playing with a very masculine guy and think it would be more of a curiosity thing.  When I'm dressed, and in one of my "bi moods", it's really a cock I yearn for and not just any cock; one that is attached to a real man who knows what he wants and how to take it.  But having a "gurlfriend" like me might be kind of nice. 

But then, there are times that DWD (Dominant Wife Diane) and I play in bra and panties.  I do love that, even though she's not wearing her strap on dildo and is dressed very femme.  Maybe she has bisexual or lesbian fantasies....just like me. 
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"Wear Something Pretty"

Those were Diane's instructions this morning before she left for the office.  They came immediately after asking me in a very teasing manner if "my period" was over.  I told her that it was and she followed up with the order that I be wearing something pretty when she got home tonight.  If you recall, each month I am required to wear sanitary pads for a seven day period, all part of the contract I have with my Dominant Wife Diane (DWD).

I tried to get more specifics out of her about what she would like to see me in, but it didn't work.  Whenever I get such an order struggle with it, even though I really love it.  I don't know if I should wear something like just lingerie, or dress to the nines with one of my wigs, makeup, jewelry, etc.  I prefer being told what to do, with little left for me to decide.

I'd love to be dressed like a 1950's housewife for her.  Maybe that Barbara Billingsley look in "Leave it to Beaver."  I'm sure by the time she gets home, I'll think of something.  
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The Cuckold Discussion

I want so much to be cuckolded again.  The first time, I didn't even know it was happening.  This next time, if it ever happens, I want to relish the experience as much as I can.  My wife Diane knows of my desires, but while she's open to the idea, isn't about to actively start looking for a "bull."

We talk about it some.  I bring it up more often than she does to be sure.  Last night it came up again, in the middle of some rather unrelated discussion.  Diane surprised me when she brought it up this time. She said that "It's likely that if I were to cuckold you again, you would know about it but the man I was fooling around with wouldn't know that you know."  She went on to say that it seems just to complicated to find someone she liked and then have to explain the whole cuckolding thing to them.  Starting an affair with another married man who needs and wants discretion would be so much easier. 

While I agree with her, I can still hold up hope for a Bull who enjoys the entire spectrum of cuckold activities.

Back to Diane.  I know her real well.  I suspect she has someone in mind. 
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Bedtime in Babydolls

I can't remember the last time I went to bed in something other than a woman's nightgown.  Once, after a rather disturbing argument with my wife Diane, I copped an attitude and slipped into bed wearing just a T-shirt and shorts.  Diane quickly asked me what I thought I was doing and told me to get out of bed and put on her favorite babydoll ensemble - a very short, ruffly and pink set that hat white ruffles across the panty.

I hesitated, but did as I was told.  The attitude disappeared quickly and after laying in bed for a few minutes told her I was sorry. 
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Sucking Cock in Panties

The panties shown on the left under my "Daily sissy Stuff" section are similar to the one's I wore the first time I sucked a man's cock.  I was on business in a city a few hours away from home and had finally decided to meet "Rob."  He was a married retired man and was home during the week while his wife worked.  He also drove a Harley.  He wasn't a nasty biker, member of a gang or anything, but the fact that he rode a Harley sort of turned me on.

I was wearing a business suit that day but had those pretty white panties on underneath with lovely lace all over my smooth bottom.  Rob just loved the panties!  "As sexy as anything my wife has" he told me.  They got him aroused, and most importantly, they put me in the mood to suck my first ever cock. 

Lingerie and other type of women's clothing all help to make a sissy feel for feminine.  But so does a warm load of cum shot all over your face.  Paired with the panties, it was the most femme feeling I'd had in my life to that point. 
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Corsets Anyone?

Many years ago I developed an interest in corsets.  I wouldn't say it was a fetish, although I did find them to be very erotic and arousing to me.  I mentioned it to Diane and we never really talked much about it until a few years later.  We were visiting wine country in California and were staying in San Francisco for a few days.  Vacations away from home always provide you with an opportunity to be yourself, let your hair down, etc.  At least that's the way it is with us. 

We decided to visit a fetish clothing shop while there and the assortment of corsets was incredible.  I almost died when Diane insisted that I get one.  The shop sold corsets online which were custom made, but there were many on the rack and I was expertly fitted by the woman who ran the shop.  Talk about an erotically humiliating experience!  I had my first corset - it was a white underbust corset and I loved it.

It took some getting used to.  Diane got better at lacing me and over time, we were able to get it tighter and tighter until it was time for a new one.  I've never been obese or very overweight, but at one time, my waist was up to a 36.  Corsetting, or tightlacing as they call it, has helped me stay motivated to remain slim.  Since that first corset, my waist is now down to 31" and corsetting helps me reduce it to a very shapely looking 24" or less.  Diane loves the hourglass look it gives me.

I probably spend about 24 or so hours per week in a corset on average.  Today, Diane put me in a corset before we went out to church.  With a sport coat, it's difficult to see and no one really notices.  On one occasion, a lady friend of ours gave me a hug and asked if I was wearing a back brace when she felt the stiffness of the corset.  I told her that yes, I sometimes had a bad back and had to wear a brace.  "Oh you poor thing!" she said.  If only she knew how lucky I really was!
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Daily Sissy Stuff

A few days ago, I thought I would add a small section to the blog called "Daily Sissy Stuff."  It's just over in the top left and I'll try to post a picture that might be of interest to other sissies.  Today's picture features some pink ruffled panties, somewhat different than any pair I own.

I've always found ruffled panties to be the most sissyish of things.  Particularly those that have ruffles just across the back, featuring the sissy's derriere.  When Diane is in one of her more dominant moves, I'm usually put in some type of ruffled panty.  I guess it makes her feel more dominant.  Wearing them certainly makes me feel more submissive.

I'd love to hear from others what they feel is the most sissy-type piece of clothing for them to wear.  I don't have many followers and this is a new blog, so I don't anticipate an overwhelming response here.  But just hearing from one or two of would be nice :)
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My "Time of the Month"

Last night as we lay in bed after I pleasured my wife Diane orally, I cuddled next to her as she held me close.  I have very sensitive nipples and she played with them very sensually.  I moaned softly as she touched them a pinched them a little bit.

"Are your breasts a little sore?  You should be starting your period soon right?" She asked me.

"They're a little sore" I told her.  "I'm due to start tomorrow."

She knew very well when I am supposed to wear a sanitary pad.  It was just one of her little subtle reminders of how much things have changed.

I loved it too.
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A Feminine Man

I'm not an overly masculine man or macho type by any means, but I'm not effeminate either.  There have been times where I've been made to act effeminate by Diane or a man I was with.  That's been difficult to do, but in just about every instance, Diane or the others seemed to enjoy embarrassing me that way and having me endure such humiliation. 

I think one can be feminine without being effeminate.  Being made to act effeminate in a sexually related scene of for some kinky play is one thing, but in a lifestyle, you  have to do what comes naturally to you.  I live very much as a "wife" now.  It's the way Diane likes it.  Some of the things I do are things she insists upon.  And there are others that are totally of my own volition. 

For instance, I keep myself impeccably groomed.  I'm always clean shaven and smooth all over except for the hair on my head.  I put clear nail polish on.  I weigh myself every day and always worry about my weight.  I never want to have to wear anything larger than a size 12 dress!  I also pluck my eyebrows.  These may appear to be minor things but collectively, I think they help me be a more feminine man.

I'm also very fortunate that I could retire relatively early in life.  Diane continues to work so I am more or less (actually more) the stay at home wife in our relationship.  In some ways it is quite dreamy, but sometimes it causes me a little angst and embarrassment. 

A good example of this was last week when Diane's friend Linda was stopping by after work.  It was on one of the days when I did laundry and I was getting ready to do the ironing when Diane called me to say that Linda was coming over after work for a few minutes.  I thanked her for telling me and said that I would wait to start the ironing until later that evening.  "Why would you do that" Diane asked.  Before I could answer, she told me that I was either into this lifestyle or I wasn't and she expected me to be doing the ironing when she got home.

When she arrived, I was doing the ironing just as I was told.  Linda seemed a little surprised and after saying hello said to Diane "Wow, don't you have him well trained!"  Diane just smiled and they went about their business.  I blushed and continued the ironing.  It was just another one of those things that made me feel more feminine.
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A Clueless Cuckold

Nearly twenty five years ago, my wife had an affair that nearly ruined our marriage.  At the time, I was heartbroken.  I had come close to having affairs of my own, but never did.  I was a cuckold and didn't even realize it or even know what the term mean in a D/s context.

Several years later, when Diane became more dominant over me, cuckolding became an erotic fantasy of mine.  I wanted her to find a "bull" as part of her domination over me.  She finally agreed to begin the search.  Postings on Collarme.com, Alt.com, Craigslist, PlentyofFish, Ashley Madison and a few other sites haven't produced any results to her satisfaction.  She's met several men, but is still looking.

Cuckolding is a popular topic on many Female Domination and sissy type blogs.  I envy the people in those lifestyles but by the same token, I understand Diane's reluctance to hook up with just anybody.  It also makes me wonder about her affair many years ago.  I haven't really pressed her about it, but I wonder if she was this selective back then?

At least I can say that I was a cuckold at one time.  I just wish I could have enjoyed it more.

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