1/31/15

Tired of Her Whining

My tolerance level for certain behaviors is very low.  Whining, complaining and bellyaching are right at the top of my list. 

Tired of my wife's whining about her lack of orgasms this month I decided to do something about it.

I used my favorite vibrator on her with my most seductive cuckold teases and it still didn't work.  No matter how I manipulated the vibrator on and around her chastity cage or on the usual erogenous zones, nothing happened.  She came close, but never came.

I caved and removed the cage.  I replaced it with one of her cloth diapers and pink plastic panties.

She came in no time.  Typical.  It took little time for her to fit back in the cage. 

That should satisfy her until I'm ready to give her another one.  But sooner or later, she's going to have to learn to have them with her cage on.
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1/30/15

Sissy Memories

In 1993, the last Sears Catalog was produced.  It certainly marked the end of an era and the dawn of a new one.  The early 90''s will be remembered as the time when the internet just took off and changed the way individuals and organizations conducted commerce and communicated with each other.  The "Mother of all Catalogs" had ceased to exist, only to be replaced by smaller and more specialized catalogs and online merchants.  

Today, there is nothing that you could buy in the old Sears Catalog that isn't available online.  And that's especially true of the merchandise we sissies were most interested in when the Sears Catalog arrived in our mailboxes when we were growing up.  The vintage/retro website Found in Mom's Basement refers to it this way:  Underwear catalog photos: boys' porn from the 1960's.

i was still young in the 1960's but it was in the latter part of that decade that the big catalog that sat in the magazine rack in our den began to interest me.  i couldn't explain why at the time, but i was just as attracted to the section that had pictures of women in bras, slips and panties as i was to those that
had baseball gloves and fishing poles. 

As i entered puberty the catalog became my favorite after-school reading on those days when i'd get home from school and the house was empty.  My older sisters, engaged in some type of extracurricular activity, weren't around to even notice that i might have borrowed a pair of their panties to use as a pretty prop as i perused the lingerie pages of my new favorite book.

In some ways i considered myself very fortunate.  In addition to the typical porn my friends and i were fascinated with, for instance old Playboy or Penthouse magazines their fathers had hidden in the basement somewhere, i had the added benefit of this book that made me feel so good and was also readily available to me.  The book was as easily accessible as the TV Guide, sitting there in plain view for everyone to see.

 Though i loved all the pictures in the lingerie section of the catalog, i certainly had my favorites.  To begin with anything in a pretty pastel color immediately caught my eye.  Black lingerie has always been considered sexy and seductive but for this sissy, it just wasn't girly enough.  All pastels were so much prettier to me, and pink quickly became my favorite and remains so to this day.

i also fell in love with slips.  They were more popular back then and my mom had plenty of them.  Most were in white, but she also had a gorgeous pink full slip that fit me very well.  i loved the feeling of the straps on my shoulders and the lace front bodice that covered my make believe breasts.  It seemed so much naughtier wearing mom's slip than my sisters.  i was extra careful whenever i would sneak out that piece of clothing!

But i think all of you know my favorite piece of lingerie.  Yes, there is nothing like a beautiful pair of babydoll pajamas, and the Sears Catalog never failed to disappoint when it came to those.  They became the first things i would look for when the new catalog arrived. 

The only disappointment came when there was a babydoll featured that absolutely adored and it wasn't featured in my favorite color.  The fact that it was "also available in pink" did little to alleviate my disappointment.  Somehow, i still managed to find enjoyment from the baby blue babydoll that sometimes adorned the pages i frequented so often.


The first babydoll i ever tried on belonged to my oldest sister.  It had a yellow and white  checkered pattern with a lace bib front that had a cute white bow in the middle.  The panty was checkered also and it had matching white lace around the leg openings.  My sister had bought it for a pajama party she'd gone to and i only remember seeing her wear it one other time.  It was my stroke of luck that it wasn't one of her favorites.  She didn't take it with her when she left for college.  i made sure i took good care of it while she was away.

i spent many an afternoon cuddled up in that babydoll and with the Sears Catalog, lost in the many sissy fantasies they stoked so well together.

love,

sissy terri
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1/29/15

A Sissy Cuckold's Chastity Progression

Nearly three years ago i wrote a post entitled "Too Much Work" where, after i'd brought up the idea of keeping me in chastity at times to Diane, She immediately dismissed it.  She felt it was too much work for the Dominant partner in any relationship and preferred "low maintenance domination."  How times have changed.

Fast forward to this past June when during a phone conversation we had while i was away on a short business trip, Diane was the one who brought up the chastity discussion.  Her hinting at it and the suggestion that maybe She'd make me wear one only when i was at home or when She was with Her lover Paul aroused me.  She was teasing me and though i enjoyed it, never thought that the idea would go much further.  i was wrong.

Then this fall Diane surprisingly and suddenly set chastity as a condition of my seeing Jake again.  Jake had contacted me and wanted to get together again but i needed Diane's permission.  She took Her time in making up Her mind.  i wrote about Her decision and how shocked i was when She said:

"You can see Jake" Diane said.  i immediately thanked Her but was quickly interrupted.  "I'm not finished.  There's a condition attached to my decision.  If you're going to see him, you're going to be wearing a chastity belt when you do."
More shocking was the fact that She'd already ordered a chastity belt for me; the pink CB-3000.

Then in late December, when the time i was spending with Jake became less frequent when he began dating a woman after his divorce, Diane took it a step further.  On New Year's Eve while we were on a ski vacation, She announced that as part of "our" New Years Resolutions, i was to begin a daily calendar that would log how much time i spent in and out of chastity.  Each day i provide Her with the updated calendar.  It contains daily, weekly and month-to-date percentages of my time in chastity, along with notes.  The notes explain why i was out of chastity as well some of my own personal thoughts.  Yesterday marked four full weeks under this new regimen.  i've spent approximately 88% of 2015 in chastity.

Another surprising, and peripherally related, event took place on Monday, January 12th.  We hosted Diane's friend Linda that night to watch the Ohio State - Oregon national championship game.  Diane delivered another shocker, telling Linda:

....that Paul would be coming over on Wednesday afternoon like he usually does but this time, "terri will be here and won't be hiding this time.  It's all in the open now between the three of us."
The announcement was a shocker to me, though Diane made it seem like i knew all along.  It was difficult to hide my embarrassment and shock, but i was aroused.

Then just two days after that on Wednesday the 14th, i sat down with Paul and Diane and listened to his "rules" for me as a cuckold, two of which related directly to my chastity.  They are:
  • When the three of us are together i must always be in chastity and he will determine if i am allowed out of it.  At all other times, that's up to Diane.
  • i am to send him a copy of the daily chastity report i send to Diane. 
And finally last night, Diane added one more small but not insignificant requirement to my daily chastity report.  Beginning on February 1st, i will also be required to keep track of those days on which either of us has an orgasm.  There's to be a column for each of us.  If Diane has an orgasm (or more than one) on that day, i am to highlight it in green.  If i have one, it's to be highlighted in pink.

This most recent command from Diane made me realize just how few orgasms i've been allowed to have this past month.  i don't even remember when the last one was.  i think it was two weekends ago.

i hope i haven't bored you with this post which is more or less just a summary of how my chastity has progressed, a timeline of sorts that helps put this part of my life in a different perspective. 

Orgasms are indeed an important part of someone's sex life.  We tend to view them as some type of "mark of success" of any particular sex act.  For many, i suppose it's impossible to separate sex and orgasms.  Seems like you need one with the other. 

i'm beginning to understand how that isn't necessarily true.  i can't quite explain it but i can feel it. 

It's almost unbelievable how things have changed, Diane's attitude towards chastity in particular.  i also can't help but wonder when, in the course of the events i've just described, Diane might have decided to connect or link my chastity to the decisions She's made in the past several months. 

love,

sissy terri
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1/28/15

A Complete Cuckold?

Last night, without sounding malicious or mean yet seasoned with more than a hint of humiliation, Diane pointed out to me that, pending my formal acceptance of Paul's rules, i'm about to experience being a cuckold for the third time since we've been married.

A Cuckold's Progression....
"The first time I had an affair you knew nothing about it until it was more or less over.  Then with Brian you were only minimally involved.   If this works out, your going to be a more fully involved cuckold.  That's quite a progression."  The last line were said with a slightly sarcastic snicker.

i'd thought about it myself the past couple of weeks, just not in these exact terms.  Of course, Diane has a way of capturing the many complexities of a situation and summarizing them so succinctly.  And Her delivery rarely misses its mark.

"You're on your way to becoming the complete cuckold" She finished before sliding closer to me in the bed and giving me a passionate kiss.  i was already feeling myself grow in my CB and the kiss made me even more uncomfortable.  There was no ensuing sex, just some kissing and cuddling before Diane officially called it a night, turned off the lamp on her nightstand, said good night and soon fell asleep.

i on the other hand stayed awake thinking about what She'd said.  i really am a total cuckold.  i've remained faithful to Diane while She's had her three affairs.  Once, i had the opportunity to "cheat on her" with a co-worker.  It was a flirtation between the two of us that had gone on for nearly a year until finally, perhaps sensing that i would never "make the first move" took the initiative and suggested we "get together."  Readers might be fascinated, but not surprised, that the reason i didn't follow through had to do with my panties.  That's right; the panties i was wearing.  This happened at a time when Diane and i had just started getting more serious about Her Dominance over me.  Having me wear panties more often was one of those first things we did as part of that lifestyle.  It's highly unlikely my co-worker was looking to play with a man in panties.  So i remain today, a faithful sissy cuckold.

Diane's comments to me last night also reminded me of a posting on the blog Under Contract to my Wife last Saturday that made reference to an article entitled  What Women Want: A Primer.   The article appeared in "Dame Magazine" (i just love that name!) and goes on to claim that among other things:
  • Monogamy turns women off,
  • Women want to be dominated, perhaps even violently, in their fantasies and...
  • A woman's desire is stoked by sex with strangers, not a devoted soul mate.
Pretty blunt and to the point isn't it?  If you read the article, it may soften it a bit, but not too much.   The article is a review and summary of the book What Women Want by Daniel Bergner which i'msure delves into these and other topics in much greater detail.

Maybe the book should be required reading for wannabe, soon-to-be or even experienced cuckolds.  Women who are thinking about cuckolding their husbands or having just urging to stoke their desires might enjoy it also.  Maybe it would make them feel better to know that they're not the only ones with these dark desires.

i've thought about buying the book myself but, from what i can tell i probably wouldn't discover anything that Diane hasn't already told me.  She just does it in a far more simple and direct manner.

love,

sissy terri
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1/27/15

Sissies in the Snow

As the mostly always sunny southwest gets ready for the Super Bowl, my sissy friends back east are in the middle of a terrible storm.  i hope all my friends are safe and sound and enjoying a "snow day" at home dressed in their favorite outfits.  Battling the elements on days like this is no fun.

It looks like New York City dodged another bullet but my sissy friends in other parts of New York and New England weren't so lucky.

Lots of snow can be fun though.  i remember the days of my childhood waking up to the announcement that there was no school because of a snowstorm.  Talk about excitement!  The bigger the storm the more fun it was to play in the snow.

It would still be fun to go out and play in the snow today....i'd just dress a little differently!

Maybe this baby blue ski suit wold be nice....



But since pink is my favorite color i'd probably choose this one....


Or maybe we could just go for a walk in the snow....






What's your favorite outfit in the snow?

In the meantime, i'll just have to put up with a little sunshine...so sad.

love,


sissy terri
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1/26/15

A Tribute to Sissy Brides

A recent issue of the digital magazine Love Inc.  featured the androgynous model Dylan Stephens beautifully dressed in a white wedding gown.  i happened to read about this on The Huffington Post , where Love Inc.'s editor Brittny Dyre wanted to make the statement that "Love is love - no matter the couple's gender, orientation or identity."  Such a beautiful statement.


i've written several posts with a bridal theme where i've confessed to my own sissy bride fantasies.  It's a fantasy that i believe the vast majority of us have but few have had the opportunity to experience in even the remotest of ways.

Love Inc. magazine's decision to dedicate an issue to trans brides has far greater significance or impact than simply satisfying the fantasies of sissies like me.  It's a bold statement supporting the rights of transgender individuals.

i'm sure you'll enjoy the articles as much as i did.  And for multiple reasons!

i've had the opportunity to wear a wedding gown on a couple of occasions (though i haven't written about it...yet) and it's as feminine a feeling i've ever experienced from an item of clothing.

i'd be curious to hear about any of your bridal experiences as well, and so would other readers.  Please share! 

love,

sissy terri
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1/25/15

Sissy & Cuckold Thoughts

i'm enjoying a lazy Sunday morning.  Diane's still lounging in bed while i sip on some coffee, read the Sunday paper and take care of a few other sissy things.  We're going out this afternoon but other than that it's a pretty low key day.  i'll just have to think of what to cook Diane for dinner.  Maybe She'll decide that we go out instead and give me the night off!

There were some interesting comments to last Sunday's post, A Sissy's View of the NFL Playoffs.  They were also pretty informative.  Thanks to Florida Dom, i now know that NFL cheerleaders usually don't travel with the teams except for the Super Bowl and that the Packers don't have cheerleaders.  Maybe that's why they lost last weekend, as did the Colts.  It's more likely that than under-inflated balls.  Florida Dom sure knows more about football than i do.  But then again, he's a Dom and i'm a sissy.

Another anonymous commenter suggested i run a search for the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders in pink uniforms they'd worn to support breast cancer research.  i did and OMG!!!!  How could i have missed this before?  Very poor research on my part.  For missing it, i should probably receive and punishment spanking while dressed in these sexy little uniforms!  Some punishment that would be.

i don't wear shapewear that often, but i got an email yesterday from Zulily announcing a sale on Spanx.   i do have a couple of Spanx items and enjoy the feel of them.  They have the restrictiveness of shapewear (a very feminine feeling) even though their items are pretty comfortable to wear. 

Most of the time i ignore these emails but this morning i decided to take a peek and ended up buying a pair of "Skinny Britches" that are similar to a long leg panty girdle but much sleeker.  Honestly, i bought it because of the color it was available in.  i'm a softie when it comes to anything pink!

As much as the meeting with Paul on Friday went very well, i'm still anxious and nervous about moving forward.  Until i actually do it and hopefully get more comfortable with the situation, i don't think these feelings and emotions will go away.  They'll probably never go away completely no matter what happens, but i do feel far more comfortable than i did a couple of weeks ago.

i'm going to take my time in making my decision but i'm sure Paul knows which way i'm leaning.  i asked Diane how i should let Paul know when the time comes.  Should it be via email? a phone call? a time when they're getting together?  Diane thinks the delivery of my decision should be special in some way.  When i asked Her to be more specific She said She wasn't sure either, but it shouldn't be just a phone call where i say "Hey, i'm ready for this."

We dropped the discussion and moved on to something else, but there's no doubt in my mind She'll have more than one idea!  It got me to thinking about how i'm going to be dressed the first time i'm
allowed to be with them as a cuckold.  In the meetings with Paul, there was really no discussion or even the slightest reference to anything about my dress or what i'd be expected to wear other than my chastity belt. 

i'm wondering if the two of them have even given it any thought?  The cuckold really is an afterthought anyway.  It's probably something they'll decide at the very last minute while i fret and worry about it for days ahead of time.

Of course that doesn't prevent my own vivid imagination from running wild.  What will Diane and/or Paul want me to wear for this special occasion?

Just another reason to be anxious and nervous :)

love,

sissy terri
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1/24/15

Taking a Step Forward

"Are you playing with  yourself?"  Diane's voice startled me as i stood in the shower this morning enjoying the warm and soothing water all over my body.  The question sounded more teasing than any type of admonishment.  Shower time is when i'm allowed out of my CB-3000;  hot soapy water can be very soothing after you've been locked for many hours.

"Of course not" i answered Her.  i was close though.  The release from the CB, the warm water and most of all my thoughts about the meeting with Paul last night and what might happen in the near future had me in a semi-aroused state.  It was a little difficult "getting back in." 

"Better not be.  you've been in there quite a while.  Hurry or we'll be late" She said before leaving the bathroom.  The two of us had a volunteer commitment this morning.  The time constraint i faced brought me back to reality and i was finally able to put the CB in place and was safely locked once again.

Our meeting with Paul last night took place in the lobby bar of one of the more upscale hotels in town.  The setting gave us plenty of privacy and comfort.  Nice leather chairs and sofas, space enough between us and other patrons and waiters who knew when to leave us alone.  Coupled with my more relaxed frame of mind it was a better way to begin our meeting.

i use the term "our" meeting because it was important to all of us.  It wasn't just about my own concerns.  Paul had a vested interest in hearing what i had to say and to understand how i had reacted to the first meeting and the rules he had set out. 

Honestly, i had little concern about the rules he'd set out.  i asked him why he felt i would need a "safe word", was there something that he intended to do to me that would require something like that.  His explanation was a good one and revealing.  He said that it really wasn't in his plan to get into a situation where it would be needed, but never having been in this type of relationship before, if things were to move in that direction, it would be nice to know that he'd "crossed a line" with me and did something i wasn't comfortable with.  Fair enough i thought.  In a way, each of us had admitted some level of insecurity and angst about what we were possibly getting into.

The "no sex with others" (in my case that meant Jake) was discussed.  As Jake becomes more involved with another woman (or perhaps women) i understand this demand and quite frankly, happy to comply.  i also trust Paul will be honest about this too.  My trust is based upon Diane's trust of him also.  One follows the other.

What was left for us to discuss was the revelation that he'd become aware of the blog.  i was honest and told him about the sense of betrayal i initially felt along with the risks that might come from him knowing all the he knows, considering everything i'd written since the blog started.

He understood how i felt and was quite reassuring that the blog would be held in strict confidence.  "I'm mentioned in it too, so I'm assuming some risk as well" he said.  Then he told me something that was another.  "You know, if Diane hadn't told me about the blog I'm sure we wouldn't be at this stage today.  It's your blog that convinced me.  She told me to read it and it would help me understand what She was getting at.  It worked."

It made total sense.  It wasn't like i had cracked a code or solved a puzzle, but the pieces were coming together.  All these months where i would wonder if i'd ever experience cuckolding intimately with Diane where little progress was made caused me to more or less give up on the fantasy.  Finally, Diane felt that the blog might be the final piece of "evidence" needed to convince Paul that it could work.

i wasn't quite sure what to say.  "i'm surprised it didn't turn you off, or send you running away" i said trying to add a little humor.  Paul laughed.  "On the contrary.  The more I read, the more I became intrigued and even aroused.  Not just your blog either.  The links to others are like a labyrinth of sexy adventures" he said.  "It was amazing.  Enlightening really."

Paul had to get home so the meeting wasn't that long.  Each of us only had one glass of wine.  Paul wrapped it up by telling me to take my time in making a decision.   "If you take more than two weeks that's fine.  "Just don't take forever" he said, with an air of dominance i hadn't seen in the rest of the meeting.  That was fine with me.

i shook his hand and thanked him for taking the time to meet with us.  He did the same, saying he thought it was beneficial. 

Then, he reached for Diane with his arm out.  She moved to his open arms and there was a hug and a kiss on her lips.  It was more than a friendly kiss as i saw it.  The innocent bystander or even someone that knew us might think the same, or maybe not.  i also saw how he held Her.  His hands slid very subtly down Her back before resting briefly on Her sexy butt. 

The kiss and the placement of his hand on Diane's butt was just as much for my benefit as it was Paul's.  Having read my blog, he must have understood the effect it would have on me. 

i was humiliated in a way; an erotic way.  i was aroused.  

It's also what i was thinking about in the shower this morning.

love,

sissy terri


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1/23/15

A Sissy's Big Day(s)

Today's a big day for me.  i get to meet with Paul later this afternoon, a meeting that will go a long way in determining whether or not i decide to go forward with the stipulations he set out last week; stipulations that would allow me to be far more involved in the relationship he has with Diane.  Meeting with your wife's lover, her dominant lover for that matter, isn't an easy thing to do under any circumstances.  It's even more difficult to do when you're approaching it from a perspective like mine - a sissy cuckolded husband.  It's no wonder the first meeting we had was emotionally overwhelming!

Today i feel far more confident and prepared.  They might be considered polar opposites because they usually don't go hand in hand, but i believe someone can be confident and submissive at the same time.  i'm very comfortable with my submission and who i am in that regard.  The big decision is whether or not i want to turn any part of it over to someone else, even if it's on an occasional basis.

i can understand and accept Paul's stipulations, rules, etc.  However, for anything like this to have a remote chance of being successful the initial dialogue needs to go back and forth.  Last week i was left almost speechless at the end of our first meeting.  Paul understands, so he's very open to hearing my side this time.  Wish me luck! 

Yesterday ended up being a very big day also, though it didn't start out that way.  i had to travel a couple of hours to hopefully wrap up a consulting job i had taken early last spring.  What began as a rather simple project got delayed several times and at the same time grew in complexity.  Finally it was over and i was just there to dot the i's and cross the t's. 

But nothing is ever simple.  The company wants me to take on another project.  i told them no, that i couldn't do it due to other commitments (a little white lie) but they insisted i could do it at my own pace.  Whatever reason i gave them not to take it, they begged even more.  i didn't even want to listen to them.  They insisted i stay and hear what they had to say.  So you guessed it.  i'm in. 

The length of yesterday's meeting meant that i'd be getting home later in the afternoon than i thought i would.  It also meant that my sissy wife responsibilities were piling up.  i'd promised Diane that i'd be back in time to cook dinner in addition to having a few other things done. 

Submissive sissy wives take these things seriously.  As soon as i got home i got comfortable (and femme), put my apron on and got to work.  The feeling that i had fallen behind in my chores and that i was hurrying to get things done and ready before Diane came home was a submissively beautiful one.  Not only did i not want to disappoint Her, i was doing what was expected and required of me as Her submissive wife. 

i was surprised at how efficient i was and even had a chance to catch up on a few emails. One that i responded to was from Penney (she with all those pretty bows on her panties!).  i told her how busy i was and why and apologized for the brevity of my note.  Wasn't i surprised to get an email from her this morning telling me that she totally understood; she had to stop at the grocery store to pick up a few things for the dinner she had to cock for her Dominant Wife!  Like me, Penney does all the cooking and shopping.  It's nice having another sissy wife who i can relate to!

But the highlight of my day was when Diane got home.  She looked beautiful as always.  She came in with Her hands full.  She was on the phone smiling and laughing (i assumed it was Paul but it was a female friend of hers), Her laptop over Her shoulder and carrying a bouquet of white flowers which i incorrectly assumed were from Paul.

Diane quickly said Her farewells dropped the laptop and came over to give me a big hug and kiss. 
"Here you go" She said, handing me the flowers.  "They're for you, my beautiful wife."  Diane could tell i was surprised.  "Why so surprised?  Aren't wives supposed to get flowers once and awhile from their spouses or husbands?" 

Well, i was surprised and a little embarrassed that i'd assumed they were for Her from Paul.  i thanked Her, kissed Her and got a vase to put the flowers in. 

Sure it's nice to wear ruffled panties, aprons, lovely bra and panty sets and so many other feminine things.  But it's the little things like this that Diane does and says that make me appreciate my role as Her submissive sissy wife.

love,

sissy terri
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1/21/15

Cuckold Discussions

Last night while enjoying Her second (and last) glass of wine, Diane brought up how many comments were generated by my "Pondering Paul's Rules" post last week.  Though She found all the comments interesting and worth reading, She wasn't surprised that they ranged from one end of the spectrum to the other with everyone offering their own advice or opinion.  She made me promise to let everyone know She says "Thank you."

Diane finds my more emotion-filled posts far more interesting than the others that deal with what She called the more "mundane sissy girly stuff" i often post.   It was a light conversation and my response
was that "i can please some of the people some of the time, but i can't please all of the people all of the time!"  She then reminded me that my main focus should be to please Her all of the time and "to hell with everyone else!"

Returning to the subject of the comments, Diane admitted that many of them made her pause and reflect on the nature of our relationship, the dynamic that Her affair with Paul has created and most importantly the differences between what Her and i have and what She has with Paul.  Diane pointed out that Her submission to Paul when they've been in private is more a kinky type of fun than anything else.  "Outside the bedroom or when we're together for anything else, in now way do ever consider him my dominant.  It's so not me" She said emphatically.

If you recall my meeting with Paul, i was left with the feeling that Diane was far more submissive to him than i had thought.  My feelings were correct, but i was way off the mark to think that it extended beyond their sexual play.  A big mistake on my part according to Diane.

She went on to point out the difference between that, and what She and i have.  "you on the other hand, are submissive to me all the time." She said.  When i didn't say anything, She was quick to add "Right?"  "Of course" was my immediate answer, not that She really needed one.  She reiterated that ours was a lifestyle that we'd grown into and one that She loved and didn't want to lose.  "My submission is a plaything, a fun fantasy that i enjoy, but nothing that I could ever do much more than I do now.  When I do it, it has a beginning and en end to it.  What you and I have" She said, "doesn't."

i loved hearing those words.  They're very helpful to me as i sort through things but i'm almost sure i'm going to go through with this.

We're going to have another meeting with Paul this Friday.  It's going to be here at our house if possible but because of time constraints i may have to meet them somewhere downtown after their workday.  i have a few questions and Paul's more than happy to meet again. 

A little while later Diane asked "You like being my cuckold don't you?"

i nodded and said i did.  If i said anything else i'd be lying.

"I love it too.  At least as much as you do" She said, then after kissing me added "maybe even more."

love,

sissy terri
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1/20/15

The Power of the Petticoat

Many years ago when i was a teenager in high school, i was browsing through a rather upscale bookstore in our town and couldn't help gravitate towards the section the dealt with psychology.  You could always count on finding some sex related material there.  It was soft porn but intermingled with the more clinically oriented paperbacks there you could find a collection of "Penthouse Letters" or a book or two dealing with some mild sexual kinks.

One day i stumbled upon a work of fiction that would become the first erotic novel i ever read from cover to cover.  And i would read it over and over for years to come.  It was like i had found some hidden treasure and i did my best to keep it hidden so that no one would ever find it.

The book was called "Gynecocracy."  The short title was catchy enough to warrant a second look, but it was the expanded title - A narrative of the Adventures and Psychological Experiences of Julian Robinson (afterwards Viscount Ladywood) Under Petticoat-Rule, written by himself - that gave me the courage to pick it up, scan a few pages, and decide quickly that it was something i just had to have.  "Petticoat Rule" - i'd never read two words that aroused me so much.  

The book is a classic in the forced feminization genre, and it served as my introduction into the erotic world of Female Dominance so beautiful intertwined with humiliation through the effective use of "petticoating" or "petticoat punishment."To be honest, i've never been the same since!  From that point on, the petticoat has always had a special and femininely soft place in my heart and in my sissy fantasies.  The book is available through Amazon and i'm sure other places.  It's certainly worth the read. 

Over the years, as much as my crossdressing and other feminine habits have matured and become more diversified, the appeal and aura of the petticoat and what it means to me always seems to come back.  Call it a security blanket of sorts.  It never fails to bring out the most feminine of emotions and arousal in me.  Fortunately, the internet has many wonderful petticoat resources available to those of us who have an attraction to these beautiful garments.  Some of them have been around for a long time and can count me as one of their faithful followers.

One such site is Petticoat Pond, a place where you can get daily updates on just about anything to do with petticoats.  It's a fabulous place to find out where you can buy petticoats in the US and in other countries, and it also has a treasure trove of beautiful photos of gurls and real girls in all types of pettis.  The gurls who frequent "The Pond" are called poofbunnies and there's also a chat room where they can get to know one another.  Can you think of a more sissy name than "poofbunny?"  

Here's a photo that showed up in yesterday's update log.   i wouldn't call wearing this pretty petticoat any type of "punishment" at all!  Of course, that would depend on the circumstances right?

Another site that i found many years ago is Petticoat Punishment Art by Carole Jean.  The site seems to be mostly pay stuff now whereas in the past, if i remember correctly, much of the material was free.  There's still plenty of stuff for you to browse through.  There's stories, pictures, artwork and more.  One downside is that it doesn't seem to be updated that frequently.  But the beauty of the content never goes away!

The highlight of the site is probably the artwork by "Christeen."  Her work is all over the web and i'm sure you've seen it before if you've done searches related to petticoats, but this site is no doubt the best to find most all of her work in one place.  Christeen captures those special "sissy moments" many of us have fantasized about so very often!

And finally,  Petticoat Discipline Quarterly (PDQ), like its title implies is very heavy on Female Domination of the sissified male through the use of petticoats.  Husbands, brothers, nephews and the like all fall "victim" to the  women in their lives and spend either a good deal of time or the rest of their lives as their petticoated submissives as a means to correct their behavior.  In addition to the fiction, there are numerous letters from women who share how petticoating has worked for them. 

The aforementioned artist Christeen even has her own "poster gallery"on PDQ and it's also worth viewing.  The site also has a fair amount of petticoat discipline that also infantilism.  Despite its quarterly moniker, PDQ has become a monthly publication with mostly free content.  

i probably haven't written about petticoats as extensively as i have today, but rest assured that these wonderfully constructed collections of crinolines will always be a favorite of mine!

love,

sissy terri 
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1/19/15

More Sissy Emotions & Another Meeting

The emotions that last Wednesday's meeting with Paul generated continue to soften and dissipate.  Paul's rules and the way in which they were delivered along with Diane's apparent passive agreement were hard enough to absorb, but there's no doubt the shock of Diane's telling Paul about the blog was a bigger part of my anger.

Granted our lifestyle is very different than most married couples, but we're no different when it comes to how we act and react to things that cause major arguments.  We love each other dearly, we love our daughters, and these arguments are typically followed with some soul searching, talking things through and sharing our most intimate feelings with each other.

Diane's not working today because of the holiday so we both enjoyed a leisurely morning at home together.  We were both very relaxed and just enjoying each others company so it was the perfect opportunity to talk some more and i'm happy we did.

Diane shared something with me that She'd never brought up before.  It wasn't something She was necessarily hiding from me but instead a very personal feeling or fear that up to now She'd kept solely to Herself.  As confident a woman as She is, Diane's no different than all of us; some of our most closely held secrets involve personal fears or insecurities.

"This is something I've wanted for a long time and I know you have" She said, referring to a cuckold relationship in which i was more involved.  Then She surprisingly added "And you know, I'm not getting any younger and I don't want to pass up the opportunity we have right now if it's at all possible."

Diane is a very attractive woman, one who's approaching Her middle aged years looking with absolute grace and beauty.  Her concern about Her seem ridiculous to me as it would to others.  But we all have these insecurities.  What others think matters little.

i tried to reassure Her that Her age should be the least of Her concerns but She dismissed me and continued.  It was best that i just listen.  "I also don't want to do this again.  I feel comfortable with Paul as a lover.  If our relationship were to end, then that would be it.  I'm not going to start a search for someone else.  I'm sure of it.  I wanted this to work so much and had a feeling it would but Paul seemed hesitant.  I thought sharing the blog with him would convince him how real this could be.  But before I did, I got his word that he would keep it a secret between the three of us.  None of this was done to hurt you."

Her words brought tears to my eyes, then Hers.  We talked some more.  We kissed and we hugged.  The tears were happy ones.

Diane won't be seeing Paul on Wednesday.  The holiday has changed their work schedules a bit.  But they're going to get together at some point.  There's going to be another meeting.  Paul's already agreed to that.

i wouldn't say i have my own "rules", but i do have a few things that i want to bring up to him.  And so does Diane. 

love,

sissy terri

p.s.  Once again, i want to thank everyone for their comments, emails, advice, support and words of encouragement.  It's a nice feeling to know so many readers care...xox

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1/18/15

A Sissy's View of the NFL Playoffs

Sissies have a diversity of fantasies and special fantasy outfits.  The sissy maid is probably the most popular.  There's also the bridal fantasy and probably not far behind is the cheerleader fantasy.  i took part in a couple of sports in high school where having cheerleaders on the sidelines was a given.  Even then, i gazed at them with more than the usual interest than some of my teammates had.  i touched on the subject earlier this week in my post on Sissies, Studs and Sports.

By the time you read this, you'll probably have had enough of all the talking heads with their analysis and granular dissection of each teams' offense, defense, special teams, pregame rituals, diet, injuries, and whatever else you can possibly think of.

i'm interested in the games as well.  Both Diane and i like sports and attend the local university's games whenever our schedule allows, but my interest in the most feminine and sexy cheerleader uniforms hasn't wanted at all since high school. 

So let's take a look at today's conference championship games from a different perspective.  From a sissy perspective!

Today's first game features the Green Bay Packers against last year's Super Bowl winners the Seattle Seahawks.  The Packer cheerleaders are more familiar with the frigid temperatures of Green Bay than the wet and balmy weather they're likely to experience today in Seattle.  That gives them the opportunity to wear something a little more revealing.  Whatever the wear, i'm hoping they have a pretty yellow bow in their hair.  Like every coach hopes for that "complete game", a sissy is always in search of that "complete outfit."  Nothing finishes off a cheerleader's uniform like a pretty bow in their hair.

i think Seattle's cheerleaders are called the "Seagals."  That sounds a little too much like "Sea gulls" to me.  Can you imagine if the team was made up of very pretty crossdressers?  Bet you're thinking of the same name as i am aren't you?  "Let's hear it for our very own Sea Sissies!" 

Fortunately for the Seahawks, their cheerleaders are all beautiful and real girls.  They're fortunate because their looks, and their uniforms are likely to distract more than just the fans in the stands.  When you're this cute, it wouldn't be surprising for an opposing receiver to take his eye off the ball and try to steal a glimpse of something else!  Why else do you think that skirt of hers is so short? 

Over in New England when the next game kicks off later in the day, it's supposed to be raining as well.  It's a good bet that the girls on the sideline won't be wearing raincoats or ponchos like the rabid fans in the stands or hooded sweatshirts like their personable coach. 

The visiting Colts aren't given much of a chance by all the experts but from my own research, i think their cheerleaders might help to make a difference.  This would be especially true if the girls are allowed to come out in the very feminine pink version of their uniforms.  Pink horseshoes  and pink pompoms might be be just enough to distract Mr. Brady, even if he does have a supermodel wife!

Much like the Packer cheerleaders, New England's girls probably aren't used to wearing skimpy outfits in mid-to-late January.  The warmer-than-usual and wet weather expected in New England
today might throw them off their game.  i'm sure they have several uniforms to choose from and it wouldn't surprise me if they're still undecided what to wear.  i'd love to be in on those discussions wouldn't you?

If i could wear any cheerleader uniform i wanted i'd have a hard time deciding which one to pick.  i'd love to try them on before i decided but in the end it would be something with plenty of pink.

i know the cheerleaders are far from the main focus of today's games, even for most sissies.  But i do hope the television producers do give us an opportunity to see the girls and their pretty uniforms today.  Otherwise it would be a little disappointing. 

Featuring today's cheerleaders as part of their broadcasts a little more than usual certainly isn't going to win them any major awards, but it will make some sissies happy!

Enjoy the games...and the girls!

love,

sissy terri
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1/17/15

Making me Feel Feminine

The "testy" exchanges that took place between Diane and i have abated with calmer and more rational conversation taking place.  i'd say we're back to normal but facing a difficult decision.  i'm not the only one who may have to make a decision about how our relationship might evolve in the coming weeks.  Diane might too.  Let me explain.

On Thursday night, twenty four hours after our most heated "battles", Diane made it clear to me that She has absolutely no intentions of ever leaving me and that if i insisted, She would end the whole thing right now.  "your the most important thing in the whole world to me" was how She put it.  As i shared with a dear sissy friend, i thought it was a very powerful and loving moment.

Yes, Paul knows about the blog but i'm not afraid to post this here.  Diane's told him the same thing. 

Diane "worked a little late" last night.  Just late enough to spend some time with Paul.  i'm pretty sure i know what they talked about.  Would i have liked to be a fly on the wall?  Maybe.  But they deserve their privacy and time as well.

Late yesterday afternoon the doorbell rang.  We're in a gated community so it was either one of the neighbors or someone who had been let in at the gate.  i was dressed in some jeans and a white ladies blouse that was sheer enough so that my bra could be seen.  No way i was going to answer the door!
i peeked through the little eye-hole (i can't think of what the word for that is) and saw a young man holding a bouquet of flowers.

i didn't answer and he left the flowers at the front door.  When he was gone, i opened the door and brought them in.  The pink roses had a beautiful note that read "To my beautiful wife.  I'll love you always."

It didn't take long for the tears to start flowing.  Maybe it's because i'd cried so much over the last day or so.  Or maybe it's the femme in me that  lets me cry so easily.  Whatever it was, the flowers made me feel so feminine.

And this time, they were tears of happiness for whatever i decide, i know Diane will be by my side.

love,

sissy terri
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1/16/15

Bows on Her Panties

Today is probably the perfect day to take a break from another emotionally filled post.  The roller-coaster-like emotions i've felt this past week need to stabilize a little bit.  i've had some heart-to-heart talks with Diane and feel we're making progress.

i also appreciate all the comments that have been left on yesterday's post.  i have comment moderation on but i've posted every single one.  Thank you all for caring.  You can continue to share your thoughts there any time you want!

But for now, here is something that i think is really, really, really cute, sissy and oh so loving!

           ********************************************************************

One of the hidden joys of having this blog is that it's given me an opportunity to make some wonderful friends on line.  A few of us share some rather intimate thoughts and ideas also so provide each other with a shoulder to lean on or a sympathetic ear to listen.

A newer sissy friend of mine is Penney.  The two of us recently realized that we have quite a bit in common other than being submissive sissies to our wives, but that's a whole other story.  Today i want to share something with all of you that Penney shared with me.  i found it to be incredibly beautiful, sexy and a powerful expression of a loving Female Led Relationship.

Penney shared this with me after reading my post about "The Femininity of Bows."  And she was also nice enough to include a couple of photos!  i hope you appreciate it as much as i did!

I wanted to add something to you bows post that I thought you might get a kick out of, but I wasn't
sure you would see it since the post is now several days past. I'm right now in the process of sewing a bow on a pair of panties. It is a little tradition that my wife/Mistress initiated after she has pegged me. I'm to sew a little bow on the panties or thong that was taken off or pulled down prior to the pegging. Actually any kind of penetration of me where I cum, (squirt is the word she uses.) because sometimes it's toys that she uses. :-) 

Each time I put on a pair of panties I have a very visual reference as to the number of times I have been taken in them; and so does she. Some panties--her faves have many many bows. Newly purchased panties await their, my, fate. "You will be bowed tonight," is her way of letting me know I'll be taken, the only way Mistress has sex with me. I have a large collection of different color bows that

I can choose from to match the panties they are going on. She says it makes her smile when she sees me in panties with many bows. It is a challenge for her, I think, to get the newer ones bowed. This is the second bow for the current pair, and the first bow of the new year! A bright red bow on lime green panties.

i have to say that i was completely overwhelmed with "sissy happiness when i read this.  This ritual (Penney refers to it as a tradition but i think it's something much deeper than that!) is one of the most beautiful and intimate of sissy tasks that a Dominant Wife could ask their submissive sissy husbands (or wives) to perform.  

Perhaps the most beautiful thing about is as Penney expressed so elegantly that "it makes her smile when she sees me in panties with man bows."   That smile speaks volumes about the depth of their relationship doesn't it.

And the best part?  The challenge Penney's wife sees to go the newer ones "bowed!"

Well Penney, here's my wishes that you get to sew many more bows onto all of your panties!

love,

sissy terri 
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1/15/15

Pondering Paul's Rules

Paul and Diane arrived just after 3 PM yesterday afternoon.  By 4:30 Paul had left and Diane was in bed trying to get some rest and fight off Her worsening cold.  i was left alone trying to process what had happened in the last hour and a half.

The early casual and innocuous conversation which included some minor teasing by the two of them suddenly turned into a more formal "meeting" to go over what Paul termed "ground rules."  The three of us were gathered around the island in our kitchen, Paul seated between the two of us.  i was to his right with Diane snuggled up close to him on the other side.  When Paul suggested i get a pencil and paper to take notes i knew this wasn't going to be a discussion.  i was there to listen.

For a brief moment i wanted to speak up.  i wanted to say "hold on a minute" or something that would shift the balance of power that was establishing itself so suddenly.  But i didn't.  i suppose it's my submissive nature, my personality, my DNA, who knows.  Before i knew it, Diane had already retrieved a pad of paper and a pencil and slid it in front of me.

Paul began by saying that for this to work, it had to be enjoyable and emotionally fulfilling for all three of us and "Not just you terri."  He made a point to say that in his opinion enjoyment and fun were two different things.  "There might be times where this isn't much fun, especially for you and I can understand that."  i was still smarting from how firmly he took control of this casual meeting, yet i understood what he meant.

Before he went over ground rules, he first wanted to talk about his relationship with Diane.  He firmly stated that it wasn't nor would it ever be his intent to take Diane away from me.  "It's not what She wants and it's not what I want, so that is one thing you don't have to worry about."  It was nice to hear and comforting since he said it with such conviction.

The next part of our meeting was very uncomfortable for me and i sensed the same from Diane.  Paul addressed the kinky side of their play.  i knew Diane enjoyed being submissive to Paul, i just never realized to what extent.  Now i knew.  "Diane's my submissive when I'm with Her, and only at times I specify.  you'll need to get comfortable with that.  It's all safe.  I do nothing to Her that She's not comfortable with.  She has a safe word.  I want you to know this ahead of time."  Of course, i'm paraphrasing here, but that was the gist of what he was telling me.  i was surprised and shocked.  i looked at Diane but didn't make eye contact with Her.  She suddenly looked so submissive with Her head down and eyes lowered.  Again, i said nothing and Paul quickly moved to his ground rules.

He told me i should write these down and if there was anything that wasn't clear to ask questions now.

In summary, here are Paul's rules.

  • When the three of us are together both Diane and i are his submissives.  i have to obey them both, but his orders take precedence over Hers.
  • i will need to come up with a safe word. 
  • Unless we are in a public setting, i will always address him as "Sir."
  • When the three of us are together i must always be in chastity and he will determine if i am allowed out of it.  At all other times, that's up to Diane.
  • i am to send him a copy of the daily chastity report i send to Diane.
  • i cannot have regular intercourse with Diane.  (This one stung a little when he joked that this shouldn't be a big problem since Diane had already shared with him that it had been years since i'd been allowed inside her anyway.)
  • Absolute discretion.  ("I want it as much as you guys do.")
  • No sex with others.  None at all.  ("That means no Jake.")
  • If I don't agree with these ground rules then things will revert back to the way they were.  He and Diane will continue to see each other the way they have been.
  • If I agree, then it's a total commitment.  No picking and choosing what I want and don't want.
  • Once this starts, any of us can put an end to it at any time.  No questions asked and no hysterics.  We have the right to walk away.
  • There could be other rules that might be added, but they would be minor in nature.
Paul wrapped up the discussion be saying he didn't want an answer today.  He wanted me to take my time and think about it.  "Take at least a week.  After a week, let me know if you've made a decision.  But no more than two weeks" he said assertively.   He stated that he and Diane had discussed these ahead of time and She was in full agreement with all of them.

He asked if i had any questions and i said no.  It was all pretty clear and i didn't really feel like talking.  i was probably too embarrassed.  i should have said something sooner.  Much sooner.  But the most startling and unnerving revelation of the whole afternoon was about to come.

"I really want to make this work.  I want to please the both of you, but my pleasure is also important"
he said.  "You're lucky to have Diane.  You have no idea how hard She's worked to get to this point.  I've read your blog so I think I understand your needs.  I believe this can be enjoyable.  For all of us."

When he said he knew about the blog i felt sick to my stomach.  It was an awful feeling.  i looked at Diane and again She was looking away.  i felt betrayed.  This blog is where i bared my soul and shared my innermost feelings, fantasies, kinks, etc.  Now he knew everything, or had access to all of it.

Paul obviously sensed my shock and told me to "Relax.  It's all safe.  It was important that I understand."  He ended the meeting by telling me to take my time to think about all he'd brought up.

The meeting formally ended when he took Diane by the hand and led Her to our bedroom, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

Naturally, it was a very emotional evening for both Diane and i.  Very testy at times. We both said things we shouldn't have. There were apologies.

i've got lots to process.  Not the least of which is how i can go about blogging the way i always have.  There's been a set of eyes peering in on and studying this blog.  And not just any set of eyes.  They belong to my Wife's lover.

love,

sissy terri
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1/14/15

A Cuckold's Big Day? Or Big Disappointment?

Being who i am, i'm understandably nervous about today.  It's the day that i get to meet face-to-face with Paul, Diane's lover, for the first time openly as a cuckold.  We've met before in social situations but until very recently, Paul didn't know that i knew about he and Diane.  Today, all that is about to change. 

Wednesday afternoons are their semi-regular weekly "meetings" that take place right her in our home and in our bedroom.  Up until today when they meet on Wednesdays i've either been out of the house or secluded in a distant guest bedroom fully dressed in feminine attire.  If all goes well today i won't have to hide anymore or find somewhere else to go.  Again, that's if all goes well. 

Diane worked very late last night presumably to get things done so She could leave Her office early this afternoon.  She didn't get in until after 8:30, was very tired and quiet.  i came down with a cold while we were on vacation and She seems to be starting one Herself.  i asked if She had seen Paul yesterday and said She did, but they had only talked briefly.

With Diane being so quiet the "elephant in the room" was today's meeting with Paul.  i deferred to Her to bring it up when She was ready, but the wait was killing me.  i finally broke the silence and asked if we were "still on for tomorrow."

"Of course we are" She said emphatically.  "Are you?"

i told Her that i was and was just wondering if anything had changed.

"No, not at all.  I'm just tired and coming down with this cold and lots of work stuff on my mind.  You know how it is." She said.

"Yes, i certainly do" i said.  Having worked in the same profession, i can understand the stress that can accumulate at times.  i was about to ask Her if She thought She felt well enough to meet with Paul tomorrow when She brought up the subject herself.

"About tomorrow, we want you dressed in just regular boy clothes when we get here.  Panties of course underneath and you can wear a bra too.  Paul just thinks it would be less intimidating to start and we just want to get things going with a casual conversation" Diane said. 

"That's fine" i said as i felt some of my anxiety disappear.  Diane cracked a smile.  It was a reassuring one that let me know that things would be all right.  "Do you want me in chastity?" i asked.

"That goes without saying right?  We've already gone through that.  It's in unless you have my permission to be out" She said rather sternly with a slight hint of annoyance that She was simply reiterating what She'd already told me. 

"Yes.  i'll be in chastity when You arrive" i said and quickly corrected myself to say that i would "remain in chastity for Paul's visit."  Diane like that and smiled again.

And so I wait for then to arrive in about 3 or 4 hours.  i've tried to keep busy doing other things but it's hard to concentrate.  i'm happy with their decision to have me dressed in male attire.  It is less intimidating and more relaxed.  i'm happy Paul seems to understand my anxiety and it's an indication that Diane has done an excellent job of explaining things to him.

On the other hand, i hope it's not an indication of something else.  For instance, Paul might not be comfortable with me in feminine attire when he's around.  If he is comfortable, then why wouldn't he want to "set the tone" right away? Could it be that he doesn't mind having his relationship with Diane in the open, but doesn't want me any more involved than i was before?  Or maybe, i'm just over-thinking this way too much.

i'm nervous but i want this to work.  It is a big day for me.  i just hope it doesn't turn out to be a big disappointment.

Oh....and one more thing.  Don't forget today is "Lock your man day."  Or, "Lock your sissy day!" 

i know it's a big day, but i've got something more important going on.



Anyway.....i'm locked...are you?

love,

sissy terri
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1/13/15

A Cuckold Announcement

Last night Diane and i hosted Linda, Diane's closest friend.  Linda is very much aware of our lifestyle and has seen me dressed many times.  As ordinary and routine as it's become, i'm always a little nervous just before She comes over.  Last night was no different but like always it took little time for me to feel at ease.

When Linda arrived She gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek, told me i looked "as pretty as always" and complimented me on my apron.  "Do I detect a hint of perfume" She asked me teasingly.  i wasn't wearing any and just laughed.  

Not much phases Linda.  She's very accepting of things and has told me several times that my dressing and submission to Diane is no big deal.  She's even flirted with me a few times but made it perfectly clear it's just that; nothing but flirting.  "You belong to Diane, and Diane alone" she says.  Last night as i went about preparing some snacks and sandwiches for the game while wearing one of my frilly aprons, She eve commented how lucky Diane was to have such a "doting wife" and gave me a playful pat on the butt, right in front of Diane....and they both laughed about it!

We had some wine and snacks before the game started and some light sandwiches once it got going.  There wasn't much clean up so i actually got to watch most of the game with the two of them.  i was just like one of the girls and the conversation was pretty normal...until halftime.

Halftime was when Diane announced to Linda that Paul would be coming over on Wednesday afternoon like he usually does but this time, "terri will be here and won't be hiding this time.  It's all in the open now between the three of us."  Diane looked at me as She made the announcement.  It was said as if i had already known about it, but I hadn't been forewarned at all.  This was the first i heard of it.  i tried to act like i already knew.

"Wow" Linda said looking at me. "That is sooo nice.  You must both be very excited!"  Looking at me Linda asked "And terri, you must be a little nervous?"

i could feel myself blushing and answered politely that i was, but i thought things would work out well

"I'm assuming you're going to be dressed?  Have you decided what you're going to wear?" She asked me.

"I haven't decided yet" Diane quickly interjected with a laugh, with Linda joining in the frivolity as well.  "Oh I forgot!" Linda said, having fun at the realization that those type of decisions were Diane's.  They'd both had two glasses of wine and despite being sober, seemed quite playful.  "Whatever it is, I'm sure you'll look just gorgeous" Linda said smiling broadly and looking at me.

Linda could tell i was a bit embarrassed and said "Awww, no need to blush.  It'll be fun.  Just relax.  I know Paul and he's a great guy.  Just enjoy it!"

The conversation didn't stop there but shifted to one that was more between Linda and Diane, with Linda curious to find out how Diane pulled all this off and how She was able to convince Paul to get me involved.  Diane explained some things to Her, almost ignoring my presence and referring to me in the feminine sense saying "she" and "her" when appropriate.

"We'll have more wine" She said at one point in the conversation.  i took both glasses from them and refilled them in the kitchen.  When i left Diane began talking in a hushed voice and i couldn't make out what She was saying to Linda.  Obviously, She'd wanted me out of the room.  i took the hint and took my time in order to give them some privacy.

i finally served them their wine and the conversation continued until the second half began.  We watched the game, Diane appeared to exchange texts with Paul a few times and overall had a good time.  There was no more talk of Diane's date with Paul on Wednesday and my involvement whatever it might be.  And neither one of them took more than a sip or two of the wine Diane had asked that i get for them.

Linda was as happy as could be with the game.  Her team was in control throughout and won easily.  During the entire second half there was no talk about Diane's date with Paul on Wednesday at all.  My presence there while dressed like one of the girls and the announcement of my "cuckolding" with Paul never came up once.  Linda was just totally into her Buckeyes.

My "cuckold introduction" to Paul is happening much sooner than i thought it would.  i haven't even had a chance to use that Victoria's Secret gift card yet!

love,

sissy terri
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1/12/15

Sissies, Studs and Sports

With all the football being played this weekend, I'll bet there's plenty of testosterone on display in living rooms, dens, bars and "man caves" across America.  It's not going to end when the clock strikes 0:00 at the close of the Denver-Indianapolis game later today either.  There's the College Football Championship game tomorrow night between the Oregon Ducks and the Ohio State Buckeyes. 

Football isn't a sissy game by any means.  But, does that mean that there isn't a place for sissies in the all-important football weekend?  Apparently not. 

This weekend. i received a rather erotic and kinky email from one of my online friends, Big Dave.  i've mentioned Dave before and admitted that i was a bit smitten with him.  Yes, i have a crush on him and it's totally understandable.  He's a hunk and a sexy stud.  So there!  And, he really knows how to push a gurl's buttons if you know what i mean:)

Big Dave is definitely "All Man" and very much into all the football that's being played this weekend.  And  he'd certainly like this sissy (and Diane) to be a part of it.  Here's a part of what he wrote...

"The college championship game is on Monday. Might as well throw the rest of your male undies out in the trash. I'm going to have you serve me and the wife in a cheerleader uniform. Only thing I'm afraid of, I'll be sending Diane off to bed early so I could take your virgin sissy pussy at half time. I know you're not really a virgin, but you haven't had a cock like mine in you princess."
Sexy isn't he? And very flattering in many ways.  But make no mistake, it would be a rare event if given the choice, a man would choose my feminine charms over Diane's.  It's a nice thought though!

i believe Dave will be rooting for the Ducks and as such, I'm sure he'd have the appropriate cheerleader uniform for his sissy to wear.  i think he's definitely a "pleated skirt" type of man, appreciating the more feminine, if not necessarily revealing type of uniform on his girls and gurls.  

Then early this morning, i got a call from Jake asking if i'd like to go over tonight to "help him enjoy the game."  i asked him if he could be more specific, like exactly how i could make the game more enjoyable for him.  It's my own way of teasing but Jake certainly knows how much i enjoy pleasing him while he "relaxes" and watches a sporting event.

Jake's invite was also flattering but it was also typical of him.  It was last minute and probably meant that his new lady friend wasn't available tonight. 

Unfortunately i had to decline his invite anyway.  Diane's friend Linda is coming over.  She's an Ohio State alum and is into the game.  So rather than a man cave, it's going to be more of a girly and gurly gathering.

i knew Linda was an Ohio State alum, but didn't realize she was into football as much as she is.  Silly me, i must have been thinking like a sissy.  Anyone who went to OSU has to be into football right?  Had i known, i would have ordered the appropriate cheerleader uniform for tonight's game.  Wouldn't she be surprised? 

Probably not.

love,

sissy terrich
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1/11/15

Chastity Time - Lots of it

On New Year's Eve in a post called A Chaste New Year i wrote the following:

Diane wants to discuss some New Year's resolutions later today and one of them is definitely chastity.  She wants to institute a calendar which will log how many hours i spend in chastity each day.  She's yet to decide what the daily/monthly goal will be, but She definitely wants me to keep track of it.
We did discuss New Year's resolutions and the chastity discussion was first and foremost.  The end result (a better term would be "Diane's final decision")  was that I would keep a daily tally of how many hours i spent in and out of chastity, enter it on a spreadsheet, calculate the percentage and enter a short note about my time in and/or out of chastity each day.  The spreadsheet would contain columns for the date, time in, time out, daily note and another column for a weekly summary.

She also told me to set it up so that there would be a separate sheet for each month.  She wanted daily, month-to-date and year-to-date percentages calculated on a continuing basis.  i would email the spreadsheet to Her each day.   i'm not an excel geek but this was pretty easy to do.  i've also been emailing the sheet to Her every day.  We've called it "The Chastity Report."

Formalizing my chastity is a significant change in our lifestyle.  It's something that i would have written about much sooner, were it not for the other significant event that took place last Sunday - the sissy cuckold gift i received from both Diane and Her lover Paul.  It reminds me of how one significant news event overtakes another on cable news networks.  Everything else is placed on the back burner.

Diane's chastity rules are quire simple:  i'm to be in chastity all the time unless i have Her permission to be out.  i don't have a specified target percentage.  She says i don't need one.  She's correct.  She decides when i'm in or out and as a result, these decisions will drive the percentage.  i can ask to get out and in "emergencies" i'm allowed to take it off, but understand that there will be consequences if She deems no real emergency existed.  i'm allowed to take it off when i shower or bathe for hygiene purposes, thoroughly washing the CB and putting it back on when i'm done.

We're ten days into this and Diane is very satisfied with the results thus far.  All my orgasms are controlled by Her.  How and when they occur is something that rests with Her.  Where once She found the whole "chastity thing too much work" She now enjoys the control it gives Her.  She says i appear even more docile and submissive than i was before.  Some may find that hard to believe.

As for me, i do feel it has had a positive effect on me.  Other than the angst i've had about what the future holds with Paul, more time in chastity seems to have had a calming effect on me.  In the strangest sort of ways, i believe it's helped me deal with the situation and handle it better.  i'm also sleeping with the CB more often.  Some nights Diane has told me i could take it off, but most nights She says nothing.  i've overcome the morning discomfort i feel from erections, learning to accept them.  They eventually subside and are a reminder that true submission does come with some discomfort and yes, even pain.

Remarkably after these first ten days of 2015, my time in the pink CB-3000 is nearly 85%.  When we started this "chastity thing" i never thought it would get to this level.  Now, i'm committed to it and obviously so is Diane.

Yesterday Diane had me put in an order for a 200 plastic numbered locks.  She wants to move awayfrom the little brass padlock She uses now.  Even though i don't, it's something i could easily sneak in and out of without Her knowledge.  The numbered locks will eliminate this security issue.   The CB-3000 came with a handful of these locks but She believes we'll need more.  Many more.

Sure, i could still "cheat" when i take my CB off when i shower.  She knows that.  i've promised Her i wouldn't.  It's a promise i want to keep.

As for Paul, he does know that Diane keeps me in chastity.  How this plays out in the future remains to be seen.  

love,

sissy terri


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1/10/15

The Cuckold Waiting Game

Diane delivered my thank you note to Paul late yesterday afternoon. Her "meeting" with him lasted longer than expected and She was a bit late coming home.  We were having some neighbors over for a very casual dinner and they had already arrived by the time She got home.  So, it wasn't until after they had left that i had a chance to ask Her about Paul's reaction to my note.

It was understandable that She was late.  She hadn't seen Paul in several days and i'm sure their offices were pretty deserted late on a Friday afternoon, giving them some privacy to exchange some intimacies.  She did text me to let me know She'd be about 15 minutes late.  These particularly neighbors are always early, so i told them She'd had a minor issue to deal with and would be home shortly.

Later, i asked Diane what if anything Paul had said about the note.

"He liked it."

"Well, did he say anything?" i asked Her, prodding for more information.

"Of course.  He said it was cute."

"Anything else?  i did feel a little silly signing off the way i did" i said in the hopes he didn't think it was way over the top.

"It looks like he likes the name we gave him...that's what he said."

"i feel even sillier now.  What did you say" i asked Diane.

"I corrected him."

"You corrected him?  For what?"  not sure what She was talking about.

"I told him that from now one, he should never refer to you as he, him or any other manly pronoun."

"Oh my God...what did he say to that?" i asked Her.

"He just laughed and said it works for him.  Relax" Diane said while giving me a hug "Everything will be just fine.  Give it some time."

i wonder if Diane is telling Paul much of the same?  Is he chomping at the bit to get into this whole cuckolding thing?  Or is he more likely to be experiencing some of the same anxiety that i am?  Knowing Diane, She's intentionally keeping both of us in the dark about the entirety of Her plan; how and when She wants this whole thing to play out.

"So do you think he's comfortable with all of this?" I had to ask.

"Definitely.  Of course.  We're just going to have to carve out some time and make it work.  I'm not worried."

What, Diane worry?  Only if She feels like She's losing control of a situation, and that rarely happens.

i suppose i worry enough for the both of us.  i want this to work and Diane is more confident than i am that it will.  my own confidence emanates from Her's.  She leads and i follow.  If She is confident about it, i should be also.

However, i constantly wonder about how this will evolve.  Diane's pleasure is paramount and should be my sole focus.  i have my own fantasies but.....will they fit with Paul's?  And even if they do, do i even want to go through with them?

One question that seems to be constantly on my mind is how much will i be involved.  Some cuckolds are more actively involved than others.

What would they enjoy more?  My presence or absence during their lovemaking?  A combination of both?

Some inclusion and some exclusion, each with their own humiliating emotions?

Will i be allowed into our master bedroom, the inner sanctum of their sexual expression?

Or, will i be made to kneel submissively by the door, so close to their intimacy but in many ways, so, so far away?

love,

sissy terri
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