A Sissy Serving Two Dom/mes

As Diane's submissive sissy cuckold "wife", my relationship with and my submission to Jake is totally dependent on Her approval.  It also comes with whatever rules or regulations She decides to impose upon it at any given time.  Those terms are also subject to change.  All of us understand that.

It does however at times cause a few minor problems, inconveniences and gets Jake a little annoyed.  None of these are big issues, but it does demonstrate the fact that i am first and foremost Diane's submissive.  As Jake becomes more dominant with me and i find myself in this "complicated middle," i'm also bearing the brunt of the disappointment that ensues.

Today was a good example of what i mean.  i've been doing Jake's housework for awhile now and he'd like to formalize this new responsibility of mine.  He's already made a list of my duties and chores but he also wants me there on a regular schedule.  Up to now i've done it both at my convenience and upon his request if i can. "If i can" often depends upon both Diane's schedule and often Her permission.

Jake is also beginning to enjoy exercising his authority and control over me more and more.  He'll do this when we're together by making me perform some menial or other personal task that he could easily do himself.  He would enjoy extending this authority by having me at his beck and call to come over at any time to perform some task, sexual, personal or otherwise.

A true submissive enjoys relinquishing their time to a Dominant.  It's part of their journey of self-actualization.  Try as a submissive might, they'll never be able to please two Dominants equally.  One Dominant's demands will always be secondary or even subordinate to the other Dominant's.   Diane does and will always have the final word on this.

So today, Jake wanted me at his house by noon to start housework.  He was going to leave work early and meet me there at 3 PM.  The housework was to be done and i was to greet him at the front door in nothing but an apron and high heels.  i told him the earliest i could be there would be 3 PM.  He told me he wasn't happy about it and that he would see me there at 6 PM, opting to work a full day.

"Same dress code" he said, "and the first thing we're going to do is head upstairs for a spanking."  The master bedroom is upstairs and i expect that's where he wants the spanking (and probably more) to take place.

Jake knows i don't enjoy doing housework either totally or semi-nude.  i don't feel as feminine and for whatever reason, it makes doing the work a bit more difficult.  i also believe Jake makes me do it that way only because he knows i don't like it.  Mind games can be such a big part of any D/s type of
relationship.  This one is no different.

And when it comes to being sent upstairs for a spanking, i find it much sexier to be in one of my maids uniforms complete with the apron and very ruffly panties.  But what i'm to wear is also often determined by others.  It's what pleases them with my own pleasure of little consequence. 

Even though i have time to blog and do some other things, my time is definitely not my own any more.  Two other people control much of it, but none more than Diane. 

love,

sissy terri

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Doing my "Maid Thing"

Diane had a meeting last night and wasn't planning on being home until after 8 so She gave me permission to see Jake if i wanted to.  He got in on Monday morning from his long Thanksgiving weekend and i was looking forward to seeing him again.  Our time together in his office last week has been on my mind since he left. 

Diane and i also had tickets to a college basketball game in town last night and She even suggested i ask Jake if he wanted to go in Her place.  "It could be kind of a date" She laughed.  i knew very well that he'd want to go if he could.  My only hesitance in asking him was that even though the game would be fun, i'd still want to have some "private time" with him. 

i was afraid i'd ask him, he'd say yes, he'd really enjoy the game, we wouldn't have our private time, and i'd be far more disappointed about that than he would.  i think you know the feeling; it's like when you're in high school and you like someone or have a crush on them but they don't like you as much as you like them.  Makes me feel like a teenage girl!

My fear of disappointment didn't last long.  Jake jumped at the opportunity to see the game, but asked if i'd be available yesterday afternoon to do some housework at his place before the game.  "There's plenty of laundry and picking up to do" he joked.  "Do your maid thing and I'll meet you there and we can head to the game.  But before we do, there might be something you need to take care of."  Chuckles......

He made a sissies day.  "Do your maid thing..."  Now why did that sound so sexy to me.  "...something you need to take care of."  Guess what i was thinking?  And why was i 100% sure we were on the same wavelength?

i finished what i was doing at home and after putting a few things together hurried to Jake's house to start the housework.  It wasn't nearly as messy as he seemed to suggest so i had plenty of time to make it look as clean as could be.  i did laundry, ironing, made the bed, washed some dishes and even cleaned his refrigerator. 

Jake called me on his way home and i made sure to greet him wearing just a peach colored bra and panty set, white thigh highs, some white heels and a cute little bib apron - it was floral and didn't really match that well, but i liked the feel of it. 

Jake didn't even mention the apron that didn't match, nor was he overly impressed with how clean the house was, all the laundry being done, the dishes washed and put away or any of the other "maid things" i had done.  Like a real man, he just took it for granted.

He was far more interested in having "something taken care of."  And so was i.  So much so that he insisted that i do it not just once, but twice.  i was happy he came home early enough.  We were almost late for the game!

Oh....and i didn't just suck his thumb :)

love,

sissy terri

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Sissy Satisfaction & Sexual Frustration

An anonymous reader left the following comment/question to my post "Serve me...you sissy slut!"several days ago:

"I believe in one of your prior posts you mentioned Jake taking your man p***y. Does that still happen, or was it just wishful thinking on your part? We would love to hear about it when it does occur."

Here's how i answered it:
  

Yes, it does. i've always had a hard time writing about the more sexually graphic aspects of my intimate relationships. So i tend to leave that our or sometimes hint at it. In time, i may include more about it. Hope you understand...xox

i tried to keep the answer simple but obviously, there's some complexity to it.  i shouldn't find it hard to write about such things but i do and shortly after i started this blog i decided that i would keep it more R-rated than X-rated.   i suppose my reluctance and difficulty to pen these things here stem a bit from the embarrassment of it, some guilt and maybe even a bit of prudishness.  Who knows.  i've given up trying to psychoanalyze myself a long time ago.  i wouldn't even turn that process over to the experts!

i have enjoyed taking the full female role during sex with Jake in the past, and this time around we've done it again.  But now, it's quite different, fulfilling and even humiliating in a very kinky way. 

Yesterday's meeting with Jake was in a strange way, all encompassing of the many feelings i fantasize about as a submissive sissy.  That's were the "sissy satisfaction" comes in.

First, there was the anticipation of receiving a spanking for what i believed to be an unknown offense on my part.  Turns out, the spanking i received was just to prove that Jake could spank me anytime he wanted to.  i questioned him about, which only led to a more severe spanking.  "I owe you one because I can" was his explanation.

There was also his requirement that i be wearing a white bra, white panties and white thigh highs to greet him when he arrived.  Whether they are easy or difficult, sissies follow orders and derive enjoyment from doing so.

Then there was the housework i did while waiting for him.  He'd left me a list of things he wanted done with the final item simply stating that he wanted the house to look perfect when he got home.  i thought it did, but he hardly noticed or said anything.

Before any expressions of intimacy, there was the spanking.  Jake was more verbal than usual, at one point telling me to thank him for every swat on my fanny.  The spanking began as playful and became more intense though never being violent in any way.  Yet it was quite painful; the pain brought about by the length of time i spent over his lap.

My ass a shiny shade of red - "Go look at yourself in the hall mirror" he told me - he was ready to have me serve him orally.  i had to slip off his shoes, take his socks off, undo his belt, take his slacks off and fold them neatly, slide his jockey shorts off and wait for him to give me permission to take his cock.  Anticipation can be very arousing.

My serving him wasn't a rushed type of thing.  i didn't spend all my time on his cock either.  He wanted his balls paid attention to.  My preferences weren't important.  i just followed directions.

i was so looking forward to receiving a facial from him.  Honestly, i'd been looking forward to it since i knew we'd be getting together.  He knew it.  My desire was ignored.  i thought sure he was going to orgasm several times and somehow he was able to show the type of self control i certainly lack and continued to have me serve him.

The last time he did so he told me to stop and go into his bedroom, take the bed down and wait for him there.  i didn't have to wait long.  He had me take my panties off and climb onto the bed on all
fours.  My ass was reddened again, sensually lubricated and used for his pleasure.

So much sissy satisfaction.  Yet, there was plenty of sexual frustration.

My CB-3000 was on the entire time, without a chance of it being removed.  Jakes lovemaking was marvelous, skillful, sensual and dominant.  He had me assume several positions, a couple of which we'd never tried before.  i wasn't able to have an orgasm in chastity, though once i felt very, very close.

Perhaps a true submissive experiences no such frustrations.  They're 100% in tune with the desires and pleasure of their Dom/mes and nothing else.  Does such a submissive even exist?

On the other hand, the frustrations i experienced yesterday provided a perverse type of satisfaction.  The type only a sissy submissive might be able to understand.

love,

sissy terri

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"Serve Me....you sissy slut"

Yesterday afternoon's meeting with Jake left me very sexually frustrated.  However when i left his house to return home i felt so submissively feminine.  For that reason, i was more content than i'd been with Jake in a very long time.  The submissive psyche works in a very strange way.

Jake's "dressing instructions" were quite simple:  White bra, white panties, white thigh highs, white heels, pearl necklace, my wig and pretty red lipstick.  There would be no fantasy outfit like a schoolgirl or a maid.  The simplicity of it all excited me.  i love white lingerie.  The virginity and innocence it insinuates makes me feel and act more feminine.  Jake likes that.  So do i.

The directness of his order, and the absence of any dress or other type of garment to cover my sexy underthings gave me the impression that when he arrived, he would be ready to get down to business.  In other words, taking from me what he wants; making me service him in short order.

Before my final preparations, i cleaned his house as best as i could.  He's not that messy a person for a guy living alone now, but there were still things to pick up and put in order.  Picking up after a man also added to my submisively femme feeling :)  The cleaning done, i began to prepare for him.

i put a bit of makeup on and thought i did okay.  It's something i want to get better at.  i did spend lots of time putting the lipstick on, wanting my lips to be perfect.  When i was done, i waited for him to arrive.

He was late.  i suppose a dominant male enjoys making a woman wait for the privilege of serving him.  That part of it i enjoyed.  What i didn't like was that i had to be back home for a commitment by a certain time.  The later he was, the less time i would have together. 

As it turns out, it didn't matter.  The short but intense and sexually charged time we spent together made up for the lack of length.  i left knowing that i had pleased him immensely, and that he'd used me exactly the way he wanted to.

i made reference earlier about leaving sexually frustrated.  That's very true in the sense that i didn't get to enjoy an orgasm.  i was locked in my CB-3000 as i pleasured Jake and he used me.  i sometimes felt that had we had time and done other things, i might have been able to orgasm in the CB (i've read that it's possible).  Mentally, i seemed to be having many smaller orgasms :)

But the sexual frustration added to the scene.  Jake knows what pushes my buttons and some of the things i fantasize about and enjoy.  While still placing his own desires first, he was able to give me pleasure in certain ways.

"Serve me...you sissy slut" he said shortly after his arrival.  He sat in his favorite chair and i knelt before him.  He seemed to enjoy how i was dressed, his cock quite erect when i finally got to touch it with my lips.

i enjoyed hearing Jay talk sexy and dirty to me as i sucked him.  He talked with a dominant tone that was lacking in our previous meetings.  He left no doubt he was in control over me.  It added to the excitement and i focused solely on worshiping his cock.

He enjoyed running it all over my face, teasing me knowing i wanted it in my mouth....and deep.  He smeared my lipstick and laughed, telling me what a shame it was after all the work i'd put in to look so pretty. 

When he was almost ready to cum, i anticipated him cumming in my mouth and telling me to take it all.  It was then he surprised me by pushing me away and standing over me.  As i looked up into his eyes i wanted his cock so bad.  He smiled at me as he ran his cock all over my face.

"Here's your treat" he cried out as sprayed my face with his massive load of cum.  His manly groans of bliss were matched by my own sissy feeling of submissiveness as his warm cum landed all over my face, in my eyes, on my nose, cheeks, etc.

i tried to keep looking up at him so that all of the cum would stay on my face, not wanting it to drip onto the floor or anywhere else.  When his orgasm was over, he began to scoop up the cum with his fingers and fed it to me.  It was perhaps the most dominant thing he's ever done to me.  i loved sucking his fingers that way.

i did it until all the cum he'd left on my face had been scooped up and fed to me.  After than, i got to suck his cock again.

i know this post is a little out of character for this blog.  Most times i hint at what i've done with Jake (or even Diane) so the graphic nature of this one is different.  Please forgive me if it offends.

i guess my sissy slutty nature just got the best of me.

love,

sissy terri

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A Sissy on Short Notice

It's been a far busier week than i anticipated for both Diane and i.  It's left us both a little grumpy.  Diane's especially cranky because Her Wednesday afternoon rendezvous with Paul had to be postponed.  She's hoping to see him this weekend sometime.  i hope She does.  It puts Her in a better mood after She's "been with a real man."  Those are Her words, and i'm in agreement.

i also haven't seen much of Jake, though we are meeting at his place tomorrow afternoon.  Like a good sissy, since he's given me a key, i'll be there early to do my housecleaning and wait for him.

Maybe Jake wants to see me as a schoogirl?

This second time around with Jake seems to be working out better.  Even though i worry that this just might be one of his moods where he craves the attention of another man, only to lose interest for several months before it crops up again, this time he does seem much more dominant and aggressive than he was before. 

For example, he's going to let me know via email tomorrow morning how he wants me dressed.  i told him it give me short notice to prepare but he just responded that "sissies have to learn to adjust quickly to their Master's needs."  That's a far cry from the way he would have acted last year!  He could be just trying to make me happy, but i do get a sense that he really enjoys taking charge and using me for his pleasure. 

It certainly works for me :)

Now, i'm left wondering what i'll be wearing for him tomorrow!

love,

sissy terri

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A Sissy in Chastity

i haven't been able to post because of some personal commitments both Diane and i have had this weekend.  This one is also going to be a little short, but i've been dying to tell everyone that my meeting with Jake on Thursday went real well.  It wasn't rushed, we had time to talk privately so that i could tell him everything i wanted to and best of all, he was more than accepting of Diane's decision to insist on chastity when i see him.

Our meeting could be summed up very well in two short sentences he said to me:  "Why should I care if you're in chastity or not?  When we're together you'll be there to please me and your pleasure will be secondary."  It's the most dominant thin he's ever said to me.  It's evident that he wants to be far more dominant with me than he ever was before.

There's also another wrinkle that's changed things a bit since we last met.  Jake is getting divorced.  It will be final in a few weeks.  His divorce has nothing to do with his bisexual desires or me at all.  It's not even a nasty divorce.  It's an amicable break up and Jake is going to keep his house here, at least for now unless he decides it's just too big.  He teased that he's now going to need a "lady of the house" once and awhile and asked if i was interested!

The afternoon ended with my following him to his house.  We didn't have much time because i had something going on Thursday evening with Diane, but there was time enough for what he wanted.

After sliding down the pantyhose i was wearing and dropping my pink panties so he could check out my CB-3000, i dropped to my knees and took his cock into my mouth.  The combination of sucking his cock and being in chastity created as submissive a feeling as i've ever felt.

From Jake's reaction he enjoyed it plenty as well.  "It's been way too long" he said.  True.  It has.  Now that we're back together, this is going to be a regular thing.  i'm going to get used to serving in chastity -  both Diane and Jake.

love,

sissy terri

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Sissy Satisfaction

i haven't seen Jake since before Christmas but that's about to change this afternoon.  Our semi-regular Friday afternoon meetings are back on.  That makes me a very happy and i hope, soon to be satisfied sissy!

His phone call this morning got me immediately thinking about what i should wear when he interrupted my thoughts with "I have a special request for you.  I hope you don't think it's too kinky."  Too kinky?  Like, what have you been waiting for!!!

Jake proceeded to ask me if i could wear something of Diane's.  i'm sure he knows i wouldn't fit into just about any of Her dresses (my shoulders are a too broad) but i could easily slip into some of Her lingerie.  Naturally, i told him "of course" but really wanted to ask Him why.  He was pressed for time but i am definitely going to ask Him. 

This would be perfect!

i went over the possible reasons he wants me to do this in my own mind and there are more than just the obvious one - Jake fantasizing about Diane.  And, if that's the case then here I am Wife who's cuckolding me and my own lover who might want to do the same! 

i had to call Diane and ask for permission to wear something of Her's (i chose a white negligee and some other lingerie) and discussed what Jake had asked me.  "Whatever he tells you, leave well enough alone" was what She said.  Diane thinks Jake is handsome but Her interests obviously lie with Paul.

i'm happy to leave well enough alone.  Keeping Jake all to myself isn't that bad :)

love,

sissy terri

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Repressing My Sissy Urges

Earlier this week i got an email from Jake, then a phone call.  i didn't answer the email right away although it was my intention to do so, so a few hours later he called me.  There was some small talk and he asked me how i was doing, how the holidays were and so on.  i had a feeling i knew why he was calling and sure enough, he asked me if i'd like to get together with him again.

The honest answer would have been a "yes."  The more difficult one was to say no.  Luckily i had thought this through before and anticipated that he would contact me again at some point.  To be honest, i'd even thought about getting in touch with him but i didn't.  Jake had often told me that his desires to be with another man, to have someone orally please him without any reciprocation, would come and go.  There were periods where the desire was so intense according to him, and other times when it would wane and be almost non-existent.

It made me feel so "used" and inferior.  i felt like i was his little toy to be used during one of his needy periods; someone to be tossed aside when he didn't feel like it anymore.  i didn't only feel like that.  Facing reality, i really was that plaything of his to use until his urges subsided.  The urges are back now, and he wants me on my knees in front of him once again.

Being looked upon that way by another man has its own perverse sort of pleasure for a submissive.  i'd love to feel his cock on my lips and in my mouth once again.  i'd love to dress sexy for him and be told to drop to my knees and pleasure him.  i just can't do it. 

The urge to be a submissive sissy to a man remains.  It was hard to say no, but i'm glad i did.  Maybe i'll change my mind someday, but i doubt it.

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The Good Little Housewife

"Aren't you the good little housewife?" Diane said to me the other night, her comments dripping with sensual and sarcastic domination.  i was wearing one of my prettiest aprons when she got home from work and had a lovely dinner all prepared for the two of us.

It was sort of a special occasion, a corny anniversary of sorts.  Not a wedding anniversary but a date that we've always remembered for romantic reasons.  Just because things have changed so much for us was no reason to stop our little tradition.  Diane was glad i remembered, and i was happy She was pleased. 

Although i did all the preparation and serving of the dinner, when we sat down and toasted with a glass of Her favorite wine, i almost felt like Her equal as opposed to Her submissive.  Even though i was dressed in a very pretty housewife-like  print dress with a pearl necklace and matching earrings, we talked intimately and enjoyed dinner very much. 

Diane seemed to enjoy the dinner so much She even told me She felt guilty about not having lifted a finger to assist in its preparation and volunteered to help clean up.  I refused Her help and told Her to just relax and i would join Her soon.  "That's the good little housewife in you" She said and after pausing added "that I love so much."  She just smiled and went into the living room to finish her second glass of wine.  She made a couple of calls on Her cell while She was there, but i couldn't really make out who they were to.  One of them could of been Brian but i just couldn't be sure.

i joined Her later and sat next to Her on the sofa.  She reached over and kissed me softly and it felt so nice.  "I really don't know how to reward you for such a wonderful dinner and evening" She told me, "everything was absolutely delicious and just right."  i told Her there was no need to repay me at all, just to continue loving me.  "I'll always love you.  You'll never have to worry about that."  It was beautiful the way She said it.

"But I do need to reward my good little housewife in a special way.  I want to do something special for you, something very, very significant" She said as She smiled at me.  "Would you like that?"

i told Her i would love anything She would do for me.  "I know you would sweetheart" She said.

Somehow, i think She knows exactly what that special reward is, but isn't prepared to share it with me. 

On another note, i haven't been able to blog much lately because of my consulting job.  It got busier than anticipated and the next few months are going to be the same.  i'm making more money than i thought i would and as promised, it is turned over to Diane and i'm given an allowance.  It's a pretty generous allowance, but the fact that i turn it over to Her makes me feel more submissive.

i am seeing Jake tomorrow here at our house. He doesn't have much time but i want to see him very much.  i don't like being rushed but it's either that or not see him until next week or the week after.  i'm going to do my best to look as feminine as possible for his arrival and do my best to please him. 

Diane is working tomorrow morning and we leave in the afternoon to fly to New York for a wedding on Long Island Saturday.  We're also going with Diane's friend Linda and her husband.  It's a funny feeling, especially that Linda now knows that i know that Diane is having an affair with Brian.  She knows i'm a cuckold, just not the whole extent of it. 

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"Marking" a Sissy

This is going to be a very unusual post for me.  With few exceptions, my posts typically avoid graphic sex scenes, explanations or accompanying pictures.  i've always tried to focus on my inner feelings, attempting to express what's going through my mind and how my relationship with Diane affects our lives.

This break from routine is a result of my meeting with Jake yesterday.  We hadn't seen each other in awhile and even thought there wasn't a tremendous amount of pre-meeting planning, it was clear from the time we saw each other that we were both very horny.  i was aching to suck his cock and he was looking to be pleased by me.

i dressed in a short red nightie and some black heels after his phone call that instructed me to wear something sexy.  i told hime that the front door would be unlocked and to come right in and lock it behind him and come upstairs to one of the guest bedrooms where i would be waiting for him.  When i heard the front door open, i decided to stand in what i thought was a seductive pose at the head of the stairs.  My sissy penis was already "tenting" the nightie with excitement.  i also had my dirty blonde wig on and a light touch of makeup.

When Jake got upstairs, he didn't even wait until we got to the bedroom.  Right there in the hallway, he forced me down to my knees and immediately took out his cock, rubbing it all over my face.  i was ordered to keep my mouth closed until he told me otherwise.  He continued to rub his cock all over me as it got bigger and bigger.

Then, he turned very, very dominant.  More dominant than he's ever been with me.

He slapped me with his hard cock.  Hard.  Real hard.  It hurt.

"You're going to suck me like a good girl" he said, "and when I'm ready I'm going to officially mark you as my sissy."

The words almost made me cum.  If i had been stroking myself, i'm sure i would have.  "....officially mark you as my sissy.."  i loved it.

"Now suck me" he ordered, and i obeyed.  i'd never felt more submissive, sexy or feminine.  All i wanted to do was please him.  i felt like his sissy, his slave, his bitch.  i couldn't wait for him to cum.  He talked dirty to me.  He held my head in place.  He pumped back and forth and there were several times that he made me gag.  i loved it all.  Then he slowed down and told me what a good girl i was.

i knew he was going to cum soon and couldn't wait to feel his cum all over my face and to taste it.  He took his cock out of my mouth and told me to close my mouth and eyes.  I looked up at him, closed my eyes and obeyed, waiting for his warm manjuice.  He unloaded on me....big time.

Jake's given me facials before, but this one was the best.  When it was over, he told me not to move and keep my eyes closed.  He wanted to admire his handiwork.  Again, the feeling of his cum on my face, his 'official mark', was a feeling i will never, ever forget.

When i was told to open my eyes, Jake used his fingers to scoop up his sperm and feed it to me.  i licked his fingers eagerly, making sure i got every drop.  He called me "a hungry little girl."  i was, but i was horny as well.  He knew that.  When i was done, he let me masturbate in front of him....like a sissy.

i guess it's official now.  i belong to Diane, but i'm also marked as Jake's sissy. 

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