A combination of things, all of them very minor, seemingly irrelevant and unrelated that took place over the last couple of days have put me in a rather blah and melancholy mood. Diane merely chalks it up to my "sissy hormones" kicking in during my "time of the month." That's possible. If so, then i should be feeling better within a few days.
Yesterday i flew to Atlanta for a couple of meetings today and will be heading back home tomorrow. As most of you know i'm semi-retired and by choice, haven't been doing much consulting over the last year. When i do take on a job, it means that sometimes because of travel, meetings and the like, there's a "break" in the submissive lifestyle we have. i've grown to enjoy my life as Diane's submissive wife and cuckold and as such, any break makes me a bit sad.
Also, i made the flight while wearing my CB-3000. Instead of the little brass lock i wore a numbered lock. There were no issues at security but as you might expect. There was plenty of angst and anxiety. i did this at Diane's insistence. Even though there are no body scanners at the terminal i would be using, that didn't help reduce the anxiety. For the return trip, Diane's given me permission to take off the CB.
Diane's demand that i wear the belt for the trip and my total obedience reinforced just how submissive and compliant i've become. Sure we discussed it, but there was very little resistance on my part as i replay the discussion in my mind. The thought of standing my ground and refusing to wear the CB never crossed my mind. Yes, this is the lifestyle i've wanted and fantasized about yet this little travel incident makes me a bit sad also.
Then there's Diane's meeting with Paul today. They will be making love at our house this afternoon, probably around the time i'll be headed out to dinner with some clients. i'm jealous about it. Sure, feeling jealous comes with being a cuckold but this is different. I feel more jealous now that i've been "outed" to Paul and become more involved in their play. Before, when Paul didn't know that i knew there was jealousy and envy but not nearly as much as i feel it now. If i were there with them, even though they might put me through some rather humiliating paces, perhaps i'd be less jealous.
This funk kind of started yesterday during my flight. i tried to put myself into a better mood by taking a relaxing bubble bath in my hotel room last night. i've always looked at bubble baths as a very feminine and gurly thing to do. They're relaxing in a sensual and luxurious sort of way. i went to a high end department store that's just a short distance from the hotel i'm staying at and bought some lavender scented bubble bath. i shaved my legs while taking the bath and enjoyed myself.
The bubble bath did put me in a better mood and i had a surprisingly good night's sleep (in some pink babydolls of course). This morning, i was perked up and ready for my meeting.
Knowing that Diane and Paul will be enjoying themselves without me later today isn't going to help my mood any. Thank goodness i have plenty of bubble bath left.